Hello,
Ill start this post off by descriping what type of person I am. Physically fit person who never judges and always forgive. Always going out of my way (physically & emotionaly) to see people improve in there current situation. I act as a theorpist to people who need someone to talk too, giving them good advice making them feel like they have a chance. I would say im that person you would always smile at, never fear. Extremly logical, always keeping my self in a realistic and calm state of mind. With every person meet I would gain a friend. I can see why some people might hate me right now, however I have the presence of a loaded gun. I feel empty… EXTREMELY empty. I lust to feel the most basic of emotions. I truely belive my hole personality is fake, doesnt match how i actually feel. Empty. I see now that the only reason I would listen to peoples problems was to try and “feel” them. Im deprived of emotion, wishing to feel something I cant(trust me ive tried). Or maybe its because im desensitized of it all. Idk, but this gun is making me feel something, inch by inch as it gets closer to my head.
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Sounds like you need someone that listens to YOU, not people that only tell you their problems. It’s pretty normal (or at least that’s what i think) to become desensitized if you’re constantly hearing and fixing other people’s situations… have you considered taking therapy yourself? might help you finding the things that are really hidden behind that attitude that you think is fake (which maybe isn’t, you might just be exhausted by always being the one who listens, but never the listened one).
Not that is relevant but i do fear logical, realistic, calm people a whole lot more than the rest, lol. I might be an exemption, but i’ve always thought that people that analyze situations are more prone to manipulating or controlling them. Not that it’s your case, but just got that idea in my mind by reading your post. I do hope you find a solution for your situation eventually (other than putting that gun to your head).