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Lost

by theanonymouschild1997

I think i know whats wrong with me now. Its not that im suicidal. I just dont care about myself or anyone else anymore. I used to be the most talkative person to the point my mother told i talk too much as much as she does. But one thing I can say I’ve learned about people and myself is that for some it takes a lot to change them or for some like the joker says in the dark night it only takes a little push. I myself was to take a lot however letting my current girlfriend deep into my heart was a huge mistake. She has done so much damage to me to where I dont trust what people say, I get angry over small things, I dont care about people, and I just want to be left alone. I leave for boot camp in 22 days and I already feel lost and what im told the Marines do in trainning I feel like my mind will be permanently fixed this way. I want to be who I was again not who I am now. I havent prayed in awhile because I feel God hasnt been listening to me so my faith is about gone. I wont tell my parents because they will put me in counseling. I guess the purpose of this post is not that im giving up but I want to find myself before its too late. Can anyone help or guide me somehow?

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