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I know

by 200085

I know im not suppose to be here, and no one wants me here. I know everyone hates me and all i can manage to do is bring out hatred in people. I know i will never be helped, or loved again. So why do i have to talk myself into it, why cant i cut deep enough, why am i scared. I have nothing worth staying for and no one wants me here. It should be easy then right? It makes no sense what so ever to still be alive when there is no reason. A lifetime in the void is better then staying in hell. Im sorry if i offend anyone

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Hazy Day Sunflower 1/13/2016 - 6:47 pm

Wanted to let you know i read this but my phone is about to die…feedback later.

Hazy Day Sunflower 1/13/2016 - 8:08 pm

@200085: There are so many people on this forum that feel like you do and have stood or are standing in your shoes. So many care about you here, me included. I have had days when I feel just like you do right now. The reason I listen to music all the time is to stop feeling hopeless, I don’t know why it does, it just does and I don’t question it.

Hopelessness is a symptom of depression but who cares what it is a symptom of right? All you know right now is you feel awful and there isn’t any relief in sight.

Keep posting here, we will keep reading. When you are ready join in on the more hilarious antics some of us get up to, you might crack a smile. Even if you don’t, keep walking forward and talking.

HDS

Mf 1/13/2016 - 8:14 pm

You know… it’s not easy. Everyone thinks it’s easy to take your own life but… nope. Survival instincts, deeply buried hope, and many other factors play a lot into that “moment” were you’re just about to do it and then you talk out of it. In the good side, well… there must be a reason that you stop everytime that might be something else besides fear.

I used to think that when someone said “everyone hates me” that was impossible, because hey, unless someone is really trying to be hated, it’s really difficult for absolutely everyone to hate them. Now i think that it is possible, but even if in fact everybody hated you, that can change in time. I mean, i don’t think the 7+ billion people in the world hate you because most don’t know you, so… yeah, you might know new people that are more in line with your way of thinking.

200085 1/14/2016 - 5:27 am

Thanks

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