A life changing experience

So it has been a while since I last made a post on this site. Some of you may know that I was in a severely fucked up state. I came very close to trying to kill myself again but being on the edge of the abyss allowed me to do something I wouldn’t of been able to do: Lie with all I had.

Some of you may be confused by my last statement, let me try elaborate. I had completed my degree in IT, majoring in Software Development, over a year ago but in my final year of uni I suffered a mental breakdown and barely completed it. I was unable to find work due to crippling depression. For nearly the whole of 2015 I stayed in my room in a near comatose like state, ruminating on how to carry out my demise.

In September I decided to take an online programming course to give me the mental boost needed to get a job but that did not work and I almost gave up at the end of that month. So at the edge of my abyss I decided to say fuck everything since my honest hard work had done jack shit of my life. It was this final step that led me, for the first time in my life, to give zero fucks about what people think.

I found a software development job and made a complete bullshit CV that said I could do everything they wanted and more. It was tailor made nonsense but it was the best piece of written work I have ever done. I drove to their business to give my CV to the PR lady (I did not make an appointment or apply online since past experience has taught me that those methods don’t work), she was rather taken back by my brazen attitude but my dedication to my lie was absolute and combined with my smart attire I was the splitting image of confidence.

I got a telephonic interview the next day. I had prepared a word document with tons of programming terminology to answer any of their technical questions and I had briefly studied up on the development engine and libraries they were using (I didn’t have much time since this was all done within 2 days of discovering the interview). They asked me a bunch of technical questions and with the help of my word.docx, I was able to answer them all quite well and even give a very good explanation on a program I had ‘made’ (found one on github). They seemed impressed and invited me for a physical interview at their office.

I spent the time between the interview practicing & learning what I stated I could do on my CV. No surprise they made me write a few methods and tasked me with explaining what particular lines of code do. I fucking nailed it all 100%!

I got the job and am starting it soon. I have already signed the contract and I am getting a very nice starting salary. I lied my way to the job and some where along the way the lie became the truth, their is still a lot I don’t know but I’ll try my best to learn on the job and give it my all!

Getting this job is beyond anything I could of dreamed of last year, my depression has given way to excitement (I still feel it poking through occasionally but I desperately try fight it back down, instead of embracing it like I used to do). I don’t know if I’m morally correct in my actions but I don’t give a damn, I lied to get the job and am working my ass of to turn all those lies into truth.

Thank you to the people who gave me advice in my previous posts they really meant a lot to me. I don’t know how all this will play out but I’ll write another post after the first month of my employment.

P.S. I didn’t want to mention any super specifics on the extremely off chance someone figures out who I am.