I do

Do you ever wonder what it feels like to have the cold end of a pistol pushed against the side of your head? Do you ever wonder what it feels like to suffocate inside of a car? Do you ever wonder about the endless feeling one feels while falling toward the end? Do you ever wonder how bright headlights are as they come barreling toward you in the dark? Do you wonder how a rope feels squeezing your neck? Do you ever wonder how horrible it feels to be poisoned beyond intoxication?

Do you ever wonder how that last breath feels? Do you wonder how stiff and helpless you become before that last breath? Do you wonder if you become paralyzed, or accept your fate? Do you wonder if you will scream or whisper at that last moment? Will you wonder if you become filled with regret or relief?

Do you wonder who will find you? Do you wish to be found by a stranger? Do you wonder what their first thought and expression will be? Do you wonder who will attend your funeral? Do you wonder how long they will mourn for your death?

Do you wonder if anyone will begin to blame themselves for your actions? Do you wonder if people who you wished to have lasting relationships with will think of you? Do you wonder if anyone of these people will feel an inkling of how empty you felt when you pulled the trigger? Do you wonder if this will cause anyone to follow in your footsteps? Do you want to hurt anyone as much as you hurt?