…right now I might feel as bad. I’ve been suicidal before, but for some reason I am not right now. Even though I’m not suicidal, I feel just about as bad as I did in the past when I did. Guess this means I’m getting stronger? Hope so. In any case, the feeling still feels bad in any context.
Anyways, what’s a suicide project post without a little sob story? We all got them, but I’ll spare you the details since it’s pretty cut and paste. I met a girl 3 weeks ago that literally met every quality I look for in a girl that also showed interest in me. We were in the pre-exclusive-dating stage me and her, but there was no doubt something special was happening between us. Me, knowing that an opportunity like her almost never shows up, made sure I never took her for granted and made her feel special. Fast forward to today, she tells me she’s decided to date another guy. It’s not her fault I feel like this, it’s not my fault I feel this way, its just how it is: circumstances ya know? Damn circumstances.
tl;dr A girl and I were interested in each other, 3 weeks later she decides to be exclusive with another guy she was seeing.
I’m not angry at her or the guy she chose over me, it happens. In fact I’m not angry at anyone including myself. It’s just very unfortunate because in those short 3 weeks I started to love her. And yes, I do know what true love is and I am not afraid of it. Of course, loving someone before you even become bf/gf is premature to say the least, however, that’s honestly how I felt. Even though I loved her I made sure never to overstep myself and respect her feelings about me the whole time. I never told her I loved her which will have to remain the case.
So yeah. I feel terrible, you know, the really bad kind of terrible. Should I not have let myself become infatuated with her? Perhaps… But I can’t help how I feel, to a certain extent.
I’ll never get used to that sinking feeling in your heart that you feel when something like this happens. It just………………………………… hurts……………………………
4 comments
thanks for sharing.. you sure were a lot more mature about that than i probably would have been
It’s just one of those things where there’s no one to blame. No one was in the wrong, but I was the one that got screwed. Perfect example of someone getting the “short end of the stick.”
That sinking feeling hurts like hell every time that happens to me I die a bit more inside
It basically means what is ment is ment and what is not , is not . so dont let that sinking feeling stick becuse it dose mean there is someone out there. But there is a lesson to learn dont let your self fall so quickly let your self fall when you know there is cushion under you.
I dont know how you will take this but i hope it helped 🙂