Never Knowing What To Say

When you are talking to your friends and they make “harmless” jokes about what you feel and what you do to yourself everyday, what do you say?

I know they do not know what happens when I’m home by myself, but they always make self-harm jokes or suicide jokes. I have recently been trying to open up more to my friends and to actually talk to people but I haven’t gotten to the really deep stuff, and I probably never will. But I have tried getting them to stop using jokes about self-harming or suicide but they just question why I am saying to stop.

Everyday they will say a joke they don’t think twice about, like that they will throw up because they have to present in front of the class, or they will kill themselves over a project, or they will cut themselves because of a speech they have to make. It is hard to sit there and listen to them make these jokes because that is actually how many people feel on a regular day-to-day basis. Some people will throw up because of public speaking or they will harm because of a school project.

I want to just get up and scream at them, but I cannot do that because they do not know. I have been more assertive with getting them to stop and it has become less frequent everyday, so I will call that progress. But for now when I have to listen to them talk like that, I just don’t know what to say and I need some advice on what to do. So anyone out there that has something to help I would really appreciate it! 🙂