Of course you do. We all deserve love and belonging and kindness. It’s food for the soul and there is nothing wrong with it, it’s not something that will run out. We get pleasure out of being kind to you. Or, like, I mean: the kind people on here and your family get pleasure out of it. I enjoy communicating with you on here. It’s not pity, I just enjoy it.
And I don’t blame you for struggling with yourself, I do the same.
I felt so happy today, and I realised that it was just other people that did it, and it’s not like I asked them for all sorts of sh*t, I just hung out with them.
I get sort of the same reaction when I explain that I have chronic depression.
People tend to ask WHY.
WHY???
Like you, I have no real answer. I sort of stammer and crawl away from the issue, because I honestly have no answer for them. I think they’re expecting me to pinpoint a specific event or tragedy. But I just don’t have anything I can point to. There’s the disability stuff, but it’s more than that. I simply have a brain that doesn’t use chemicals the same way other brains do. And so far, no depression meds have worked, despite decades of trying.
I expect it will be that way my whole life, but it’s near-impossible to get “normal” people to wrap their heads around that.
That’s one of the reasons I feel safer with all of you here; I don’t have to waste time explaining that. You already understand, for the most part.
Also, what mus said: YOU are valuable. 🙂
I like what you add to the site, and your real-life friends must surely believe that you add good things to their lives as well.
Hey Whisky, don’t worry about deserving it. You are trying to control too much, but you can’t control what others feel or think. That is difficult for us all, to understand that part.
So if I want to like you, you can’t make me change my mind. Not that I care. But what I mean is if someone loves you you can’t make that person change his/her mind.
And I know that becomes a weight you can fear, but don’t take the bad part of it. Just focus on the part that warms your soul.
You may feel divided as you live it like that. But people around you love you all. The one that hurts and the one that’s hurting. And it is hard to love the one that hurts but it is also necessary. Love her, she is suffering too and she loves you too.
You’re supposed to say that you’re grateful, but that it’s not about them, or anything they do. It’s about you, and how you deal with yourself. Sure, it might take them a while to understand, but at least that’s how i see it.
I agree with moneypenny’s opinion too, you can’t control what others fell or think, specially when it comes to feelings or thoughts they have towards you. If people at the sp want to like you, heh, that’s their choice, same with your loved ones over there. Trust me, everyone will cause harm to others eventually, regardless of their mental state, and that’s something most people know, even if they don’t acknowledge it on a regular basis.
The best you can do? minimize the damage you do to yourself, and to others. Do keep in mind, that won’t always work, so don’t be so hard on yourself about it, there’s things that can’t be avoided, regardless of how much you try to keep a grasp of them.
Don’t blame it on yourself for the way you feel. Don’t blame yourself for people growing attached to you because that’s on them. Even if at one time you were happy and they fell in love with that happy person you were and now they feel betrayed because you aren’t that happy person YOU DIDNT DECIDE TO GET DRAINED OF HAPPINESS! You can’t dance the same way and no one understands why but neither do you so why should the guilt be on you?
I emphasize with the tormenting guilt though as it seems to come automatically and add more weight to weigh you down and that sucks 🙁 wish I could take it away for you.
The broken kat deserves love too so don’t feel bad about the love you get from us on here , whatever you decide to do is perfectly fine too, you won’t be judged badly from this community for anything! 🙂
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Of course you do. We all deserve love and belonging and kindness. It’s food for the soul and there is nothing wrong with it, it’s not something that will run out. We get pleasure out of being kind to you. Or, like, I mean: the kind people on here and your family get pleasure out of it. I enjoy communicating with you on here. It’s not pity, I just enjoy it.
And I don’t blame you for struggling with yourself, I do the same.
I felt so happy today, and I realised that it was just other people that did it, and it’s not like I asked them for all sorts of sh*t, I just hung out with them.
Take care whiskered-fish, you are valuable.
I get sort of the same reaction when I explain that I have chronic depression.
People tend to ask WHY.
WHY???
Like you, I have no real answer. I sort of stammer and crawl away from the issue, because I honestly have no answer for them. I think they’re expecting me to pinpoint a specific event or tragedy. But I just don’t have anything I can point to. There’s the disability stuff, but it’s more than that. I simply have a brain that doesn’t use chemicals the same way other brains do. And so far, no depression meds have worked, despite decades of trying.
I expect it will be that way my whole life, but it’s near-impossible to get “normal” people to wrap their heads around that.
That’s one of the reasons I feel safer with all of you here; I don’t have to waste time explaining that. You already understand, for the most part.
Also, what mus said: YOU are valuable. 🙂
I like what you add to the site, and your real-life friends must surely believe that you add good things to their lives as well.
Hey Whisky, don’t worry about deserving it. You are trying to control too much, but you can’t control what others feel or think. That is difficult for us all, to understand that part.
So if I want to like you, you can’t make me change my mind. Not that I care. But what I mean is if someone loves you you can’t make that person change his/her mind.
And I know that becomes a weight you can fear, but don’t take the bad part of it. Just focus on the part that warms your soul.
You may feel divided as you live it like that. But people around you love you all. The one that hurts and the one that’s hurting. And it is hard to love the one that hurts but it is also necessary. Love her, she is suffering too and she loves you too.
You’re supposed to say that you’re grateful, but that it’s not about them, or anything they do. It’s about you, and how you deal with yourself. Sure, it might take them a while to understand, but at least that’s how i see it.
I agree with moneypenny’s opinion too, you can’t control what others fell or think, specially when it comes to feelings or thoughts they have towards you. If people at the sp want to like you, heh, that’s their choice, same with your loved ones over there. Trust me, everyone will cause harm to others eventually, regardless of their mental state, and that’s something most people know, even if they don’t acknowledge it on a regular basis.
The best you can do? minimize the damage you do to yourself, and to others. Do keep in mind, that won’t always work, so don’t be so hard on yourself about it, there’s things that can’t be avoided, regardless of how much you try to keep a grasp of them.
Don’t blame it on yourself for the way you feel. Don’t blame yourself for people growing attached to you because that’s on them. Even if at one time you were happy and they fell in love with that happy person you were and now they feel betrayed because you aren’t that happy person YOU DIDNT DECIDE TO GET DRAINED OF HAPPINESS! You can’t dance the same way and no one understands why but neither do you so why should the guilt be on you?
I emphasize with the tormenting guilt though as it seems to come automatically and add more weight to weigh you down and that sucks 🙁 wish I could take it away for you.
The broken kat deserves love too so don’t feel bad about the love you get from us on here , whatever you decide to do is perfectly fine too, you won’t be judged badly from this community for anything! 🙂
My deepest thanks, everyone. I can’t really answer all of these. But I read them all and appreciated them. They were helpful. Thank you.