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too broken for anyone

by WastingtheUnknown

I guess I’m too broken for friends or for anyone to want to hang out with me, or just talk to me; no one from anxiety groups, school, etc, etc, etc. It doesn’t matter how hard I try to reach out, people still drift away. It just doesn’t matter when it comes to me. People just want me gone, I guess.

Well, random post is random… Sorry for yet, another useless post.

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13 comments

Alan Ominous 2/12/2016 - 11:15 pm

Not a waste. Welcome. Sorry you feel the need to be here, but glad you came.

whiskered-fish 2/12/2016 - 11:18 pm

No post is useless if it helps you get out some of your thoughts/feelings.

bah 2/12/2016 - 11:56 pm

I feel too broken too 🙁

Moneypenny 2/13/2016 - 12:08 am

Bah: you are not broken, you are just a very sweet delicate beautiful person, who’s actually really strong

WastingTU: as bah says, we can all relate to this, you are not alone.

bah 2/13/2016 - 12:12 am

aww thanks *sniff sniff*

bah 2/13/2016 - 12:37 am

i wish people irl would see me that way

day2day 2/13/2016 - 12:39 am

Sorry to hear of your situation Wasting. Desperate times call for desperate measures, I’d suggest trying to reconnect with families or friends from the past-anyone that you were close to at one time.

It’s harder to make friends nowadays-when I was a kid, it was very easy and people were loyal back then as well. While I have some friends and family contacts, I tried to expand my ‘friend-network’ through work but that didn’t pan out-despite having very good relationships with some people-at work-but it never went beyond.

In my case I’m still fine with the contacts I have, but perhaps you’d want to consider joining recreational groups, like sports or some hobby where you can connect with others. Just don’t open up about your life or your past until they get to know you well, because people have a tendency to run away from others who might be going through hardships since they don’t want to be burdened. Once you become good friends (usually takes a year or two) then you could be more open.

I’m sure there are others in a similar situation who’d willing to be your friends-it wouldn’t hurt to try one of those online meeting/dating sites as well. Good luck.

WastingtheUnknown 2/13/2016 - 2:04 am

Thanks, day2day. The thing is, I’ve never really been close to anyone whilst in school. Only ever acquaintances that would say “hi” only when it was convenient for them. Nevertheless, I managed to message one acquaintance about a year ago, I think. And I haven’t heard from them since. I managed to get a number from someone in this mental health group that I no longer go to, and we texted back and forth for a few months. But she suddenly stopped; the last message was back in November when I was hospitalized.

As far as family goes, I only talk to my brother, that’s it. I guess, I just want to be able to meet people on my own, before it’s too late. It probably is already too late for me. I’m thinking of joining a club at my college. Maybe I still have a chance at that, maybe not. Maybe I’ll fail at that too. I’m losing my will to care. And what point is there for me, if people don’t even want to be near me? I don’t see one, anymore…

Moneypenny 2/13/2016 - 4:30 am

WashingTU, just remember social abilities must be learned too, the more you practice the better it will go. You haven’t been able to develop them as much as others but you have new chances now, don’t give up until you learn. I am still trying to learn them and it’s a little frustrating to see people half my age doing a hundred times better than me at it, but I can notice I have improved a lot than when I first started college.

xoxosiamese-catxoxo 2/13/2016 - 1:07 am

ur not the only one i’m someone people are ashamed of to stand close to because i look so cowardly

WastingtheUnknown 2/13/2016 - 2:34 am

I know the feeling too well. Even when I still had some confidence in myself, people went out of their way to avoid me. And that’s exactly why I look deprived of life (head down when walking, avoiding eye contact).

Moneypenny 2/13/2016 - 4:33 am

It’s not a cowardly look, it’s a look of someone that may be too warned of people. We close ourself to others with this invisible barrier of fear, and we think people can’t sense it, but they sure can

WastingtheUnknown 2/13/2016 - 2:12 am

And thanks for everyone else that posted.

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