Those are the only two emotions I feel anymore..
When I’m mad I turn into a monster, and feel like I have zero control over myself. This rage is like a hurricane destroying everything, and everyone in my way.
When I’m sad I cry about every little thing, and I mean EVERYTHING.. Someone looks at me the wrong way, and I start tearing up. Something very minor happens in a T.V show, I start balling my eyes out.
My mother is always saying that I need to get out of this “funk” I’m in. What she doesn’t realize is that I honestly cannot remember a time where I was truly happy, and weed/alcohol was not involved. Don’t you think if I could magically flip a switch and be happy I would have by now?
Sometimes this sadness consumes me, and all I can do is think about death.
How peaceful it must be to just not exist anymore.
My mother says it’s a cowards way out, I guess I take after my father.