I’ve seriously had to think about jumping or hanging myself at work or jumping in front of a train because this is such bullshit and I’m getting abused on top of it. My job’s become unbearable because of the coworker who’s decided to have a problem with me and trying to get rid of me. Well yeah it’s fucking working. She’s been lying and complaining about me to the boss saying I stink, that I’ve filled the coffee pot with my coffee mug that I drank out of, that I fart and burp the whole day at work, and that I don’t shower and smell like shit. And she’s done this incessantly for the last couple of months and she got in my face Friday and accused me of bringing diseases in there and trying to get her sick on purpose, and said that I opened the window all the way (no like 2-3 inches isn’t all the way) to make her sick on purpose (I was having a hot flash), and accused me of coughing over top of her when we sit like 15 feet apart at opposite ends of the office and I hadn’t even coughed at all at that point. Then the boss had a videoconference with us for like 3 hours, and things got even worse. I was basically told that everything is my fault and I need to better my health so that I don’t have hot flashes or any other problems that would disturb others and I need to appease my coworker. Because, get this. Something was said that was something along the lines of, that white people who work in an office with black people just don’t realize that everything we do and say is malicious towards them and said and done to make the black people feel like they’re less than. And that’s really hurt me and shocked me because that was like the last thing I ever expected to hear, first of all, because I don’t treat people badly and if anything I bend over backwards way too fucking much for every god damn person on earth, and I sure as fuck know my place on earth is to be below all 7.8billion other people on earth and that I rank ABSOLUTELY LAST in this world so I don’t understand how in the fuck I have an ego problem and am demeaning anyone?!? So the only way I can fucking process that at all is that I’m always in the wrong and I’m always going to be SHIT because I’m white. Well fuck! How the fuck am I supposed to react to that?!?! So now I feel like it’s a hostile work environment and I want nothing more than to get the fuck out. I WISH I could fucking quit, but my 1st job doesn’t even cover the rent I agreed to pay, so it’s not possible to just quit. I don’t have the fancy clothes let alone master’s degree or 15 yrs experience to get any of the “entry level” jobs out there not even customer service or data entry will take me unless I were 25 or younger and just got my master’s degree but also had 15 years paid work experience to claim. And something else was said that really hurt me too. This comes from having posted on Facebook about how bad my situation is now because I could literally end up in prison over having fucking worked for the first time in my life, so yeah, fuck my again for trying to get my head above water! But from both jobs I owe a shit ton in taxes. Because it really is that my first job is so few hours that I don’t make enough to have any tax taken out so I owe that all in one lump sum and then I owe half of what I made through the 2nd job as self employment tax when we were told to not worry because our bosses made $26k & $38k as self employed and didn’t owe a dime of tax so rest assured we’re not going to owe a penny of the $3k we will make. Well that’s fucking bullshit because I owe $1200 and the government can charge me nearly $300 more just for being low income. And I have no way to do anything about it because the people who did my taxes told me it would be simple to sign up online for a payment plan and the IRS site locks me out every time and won’t let me sign up which means I can only fucking wait for the government to come after me!!!! I WISH THEY’D FUCKING COME AFTER ME AND KILL ME!!!!!!!!!!!!! I’m disabled, marginally & by the skin of my teeth a hair above being homeless, and THIS is the shit I get for trying to WORK MY ASS OFF to get to a better place in life?!?!? SO what was said was that my boss said I was causing problems because I’m “upset that I have to pay a bill” which makes me feel belittled by my boss and really like I’ve been duped and used. I WANT OUT!!! But yeah I can’t quit. Then they both – my boss and coworker got into a little conversation about how (coworker) “Oh I don’t need this job, this isn’t the end all be all, this is just a stepping stone” and (boss) “Yes this place is just supposed to be a stepping stone and was never meant to be a full time job”. But my coworker is a lying ***** who called me a liar when I tried to tell the truth on her and tell my boss that she doesn’t do shit but talk on the phone, take selfies, play games on her ipad, and blare music in her ears and she gets paid to fucking do that?!? But in the end I’m ultimately wrong and I’m the liar so whatever the **** says about me to my boss, my boss is going to believe and take her side. There’s no fucking sense in this shit, being in debt and in danger of going to prison over having two jobs that only add up to 20 hrs of paid time a week and to be lied about constantly and have my coworker in my face yelling and screaming and being hostile and violent towards me while I’m trying to work!!! Tell me how the fuck is this right?!?! I wish I had the guts to jump out the window. You think someone who’s 360 lbs would die from an 8 story jump? If the building were right over a body of water I could do it, but I’m too much of a ***** to jump to concrete. I could hang myself in the stairwell maybe but I’ve read too much about how fat people can’t hang themselves either. I could just as well in the basement where I’m living which would be really hard to do considering that I’m 5’5″ and my head nearly touches the ceiling. But it is a place with solid support beams that I could access and lock the door from the inside, to which no one here has a key, and be able to kill myself overnight sometime if I had the way to do it. I’m so fucking sick of this shit!!!!!!