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I’m not doing so well tonight…

by claritee

I think I’m just going to go to sleep. I mean, why stay up and just torture myself with my thoughts? I hate myself. My life. Everything.


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distant.road 4/2/2016 - 11:02 pm

I’m sorry. Is there anything you want to talk about?

kupo95 4/2/2016 - 11:05 pm

Im sorry to hear that sleeping is good . but if you want to talk im here…..

.. sitting by your bed watching you sleep breathing.. 😉 .

DoubleZero 4/2/2016 - 11:11 pm

I’m sorry you’re not doing well. We may not know each other, but if you want to talk, I’m here as well.
But try not to go to sleep sad. Watch funny videos on youtube, or cat videos, or maybe a movie that you like? (Tip: I read lots of fanfiction when I go to bed, so my mind doesn’t kill me. I only turn off the computer – or my phone- when I’m sure my pills have made effect and I’m really sleepy)

claritee 4/3/2016 - 12:07 am

I can’t seem to ever focus on anything lately. I try to read or watch a movie. I end up just in a daze. Nothing satisfies.

DoubleZero 4/3/2016 - 12:14 am

It’s ok, it can happen. I don’t read long fics, only one shots, I never finished them otherwise. When I can’t focus on a movie, I watch horror shorts on youtube. Maybe you can do that as well (or funny clips, whatever floats your boat ;))
And don’t apologize for writing about what bothers/ inspires you. If it’s what on your mind, then we want to know. Always. That’s why we are here.
Also, if you want to talk about problematic exes, I’m all ears.

claritee 4/3/2016 - 12:05 am

I just wrote a letter to my ex and I feel so much better.

BTW, I’m so sorry. About 90% of the shit I write here is about my fucking ex.

I’m really sorry, you guys must be tired of seeing the same old crap from me.

kupo95 4/3/2016 - 12:08 am

No im tired I love its like reality show what gonna happen next kinda thing so dont apologize. Did you feel like you got everything off your chest in the letter?

claritee 4/3/2016 - 12:15 am

I did, that’s why I feel relief. We talked a few days ago and we decided to not be friends right now, but he’s still talking to me as if he wants to be my friend. It’s hard because how can I ever get over him? It makes me wish we were more. It’s a miserable feeling. In the letter I explained everything, why it hurts so much and I told him that we can never talk again. This makes me feel better. I’m afraid to actually send it to him though. I really should. It’s just the finality of it…

kupo95 4/3/2016 - 12:22 am

Idk about sending it I say send it but also say no because you will overwhelming regert but you have nothing to regret. Send it

claritee 4/3/2016 - 12:06 am

Can I ask you guys something though….

Is there a name for someone that gets hysterical… then calms down? I’ve been feeling as if I lose absolute control and then I exhaust myself and calm down. I haven’t been formally diagnosed with anything.

kupo95 4/3/2016 - 12:13 am

Uh yes there is being human with emotions syndrome

claritee 4/3/2016 - 12:15 am

lol ok

DoubleZero 4/3/2016 - 12:16 am

Maybe you’re just way too stressed and can’t control your reactions very well, but it’s really normal. You don’t need to be sick to have outbursts.

claritee 4/3/2016 - 12:59 am

yeah you’re probably right

claritee 4/3/2016 - 12:08 am

I make rash decisions and just fly off the handle and later regret it.

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