Hi, gkks. I think that the length of time might not necessarily be the main point. In this case, whispered-fish had an appointment scheduled that she was not only prepared for, but was anticipating. The appointment didn’t happen. That’s issue #1.
Issue #2 is that she perceived that yard work was more important than her welfare. Regardless of what actually happened, ones perception is their reality.
Time might be issue #3. However, whether it’s one minute later, one day later, one week later, etc. it doesn’t remove issues #1 and #2.
The title of this post might have been a quote said to her… It doesn’t seem to reflect her own thoughts.
I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it like that. All I meant is that you will have in here someone to talk to and this week will pass sooner or later. I know it might feel like hell but it will pass. I am sorry again.
Fuck the yard. Ur mental health should be number 1. A week can be a hell of a long time. Hope u make it. Ur comnents have helped others so much. I hope people can do the same for u. Sorry I cant, today is almost killing me.
@Whiskered-fish it is true that alot can happen in a week, when every hour is a struggle a minute can feel like days, what concerns me more than the delay is your reaction to it, obviously i understand the indignation of the postponement but the way i read your post, and comment gave me the impression that you believe one session could save you, or give you a way to keep going. i feel compelled to say that that may not be the case. theres only one thing in the world thats going to keep you going and thats you. we all have something that motivates us, gets us out of bed when we want to lie there in a ball under the covers, we all have that one drive inside us that keeps us going. while a psychologist is a good thing for anyone experiencing suicidal tendencies it is important to remember they arent a cure in and of themselves, they merely help us find a way forward, or give us pills.. Either way, if i may offer some advice take a journey inwards, try and find your drive, that thing inside that keeps you going, sometimes it can be incredibly hard to find, im still looking, tho i know where im looking. once you find it its easier to get your shit together and keep going, because it gives you the direction your going. so take this week, not as a bad thing, but as a chance to find a bit more of yourself. everything you need to get through this is already inside you my friend, all a psychologist is going to do is help you find it, but nothing is stopping you from searching for yourself you may think im talking out my ass and thats cool. but if you want to chat, drop me an email, or mention my name in a comment and ill come across it.
Peace, Love & Strength brother
Procel
Procel, I appreciate your advice. A lot. But I already know that a therapist isn’t a panacea. I am aware that they can’t solve your problems. But what do you do when your cup is overflowing? You pour out a little off the top. And I’m boiling over already.
And I find it bitterly hilarious that about 80% of the reason why I’m in this place to begin with is because of the cruelty of other people. Because of the way I’ve been treated by others. But I have to save myself. Man. That’s a kicker. They’ll drive you into the hole but they won’t pull you back out. That’s like walking into somebody’s house, smearing dog shit all over their walls, and then acting like you shouldn’t help them clean it up.
If I have to rely entirely on myself, then I know I’m already doomed. The only reason I even “want” to live is because of my religion and other people. I don’t want to burn in Hell and I don’t want to destroy my family and friends. But as for myself? I don’t have any personal interest in my continued existence. I’m trying to live for the sake of everybody else.
I’m not trying to say that you’re wrong. You’re probably right. You’re older than me. No doubt smarter. It’s just that if you are right, then I’m a hopeless case.
Thanks w fish. Can I call u that? Just got a free coffee on my way to work, made me smile. . I call those things silver box’s. Just like a message or comment from a stranger who cares.
Sure. Call me whatever you like. I do get ‘Fish’ a lot.
Silver Boxes…that’s intriguing. I think I might’ve had a word for those things too, at one point. But I can’t remember what it was.
Anyway. Enjoy that coffee.
This honestly makes me so mad at him. I assume he knows how you feel yet in his mind he thinks that a prolonged amount of time from a therapist is quite alright. Tell him to get his priorities straight!
My grandparents aren’t even bad people. They’re good grandparents. Not perfect. I mean, they’ve got problems with their tempers. And with drinking. But they’re better than I deserve, at least. If anything it’s my fault. I hide how I’m doing. They probably don’t even know how bad I’m doing. I was angry when I wrote this, and I still am to a point, but this is my fault.
How can you say that….. I do not entirely know you well but, based on what I have seen you write, you definately deserve a heck of a lot more. Your a super gal!
Thanks, but I am not super. I am a spoiled brat who complains about her grandparents—the people who feed her, clothe her, and let her live with them—online, where they can’t even defend themselves.
Sometimes grandparents grew up in a time where mental health wasn’t such a priority. Ages ago, being depressed was often treated like being sad… maybe ‘really’ sad. So perhaps it wasn’t a conscious decision to put your needs second… Maybe they just didn’t fully understand your needs… given their knowledge of how things were.
It’s like when my grandpa used to tell me, “I walked to school 13 miles each way… even in a blizzard.” Times have changed and, in many places, one flurry can shut everything down. However, my grandpa wasn’t trying to be mean… He was just talking from an angle that he understood… outdated or not.
Not sure if this applies…. Just trying to demonstrate that it might not have been deliberately done.
That is a pretty good point, distant road. Thanks.
I think that’s true for my grandfather. Really, really true. Although he tries to understand. Sometimes he does more harm than good. But he tries.
My grandmother, on the other hand, actually is on antidepressants. She doesn’t understand psychotic features, but she understands depression. She has a habit of self-medicating with alcohol, though. That’s her primary coping mechanism.
It’s nog fair for the to decide to postpone your health for the yard. They don’t know everything about you to be able to decide you’ll be fine. Your mental and physical health is #1. But don’t let this set you back in life. Try to make it to next Tuesday the best you can.
Thanks, magnolia. I’ll try my hardest. Like I said, though, I’m doing this for the people who want me to be alive. I am not among those people. I don’t really want to be here anymore, in all honesty.
Processing your request, Please wait....
32 comments
Like the title says, one week isn’t going to kill you.
How do you figure that, gkks? How do you or anyone else know what will or won’t kill me? Do you have a crystal ball?
I guess not. But it’s only a week. It shouldn’t kill you.
Hi, gkks. I think that the length of time might not necessarily be the main point. In this case, whispered-fish had an appointment scheduled that she was not only prepared for, but was anticipating. The appointment didn’t happen. That’s issue #1.
Issue #2 is that she perceived that yard work was more important than her welfare. Regardless of what actually happened, ones perception is their reality.
Time might be issue #3. However, whether it’s one minute later, one day later, one week later, etc. it doesn’t remove issues #1 and #2.
The title of this post might have been a quote said to her… It doesn’t seem to reflect her own thoughts.
I guess. On the outside at least.
I’m so sick of doing this. And over sixty more years to go? No thank you. Already too tired, and I haven’t even been here long.
The title of the post was what my grandmother said to me, after I heard about the rescheduling and started getting upset.
I saw the quotation marks and figured that it was something like that.
I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it like that. All I meant is that you will have in here someone to talk to and this week will pass sooner or later. I know it might feel like hell but it will pass. I am sorry again.
Don’t be sorry, gkks. I was a bit harsh with you with my first reply, but I know you aren’t trying to be dismissive. It’s okay.
Fuck the yard. Ur mental health should be number 1. A week can be a hell of a long time. Hope u make it. Ur comnents have helped others so much. I hope people can do the same for u. Sorry I cant, today is almost killing me.
Thanks.
And don’t feel like you have to apologize. I hope you don’t die.
@Whiskered-fish it is true that alot can happen in a week, when every hour is a struggle a minute can feel like days, what concerns me more than the delay is your reaction to it, obviously i understand the indignation of the postponement but the way i read your post, and comment gave me the impression that you believe one session could save you, or give you a way to keep going. i feel compelled to say that that may not be the case. theres only one thing in the world thats going to keep you going and thats you. we all have something that motivates us, gets us out of bed when we want to lie there in a ball under the covers, we all have that one drive inside us that keeps us going. while a psychologist is a good thing for anyone experiencing suicidal tendencies it is important to remember they arent a cure in and of themselves, they merely help us find a way forward, or give us pills.. Either way, if i may offer some advice take a journey inwards, try and find your drive, that thing inside that keeps you going, sometimes it can be incredibly hard to find, im still looking, tho i know where im looking. once you find it its easier to get your shit together and keep going, because it gives you the direction your going. so take this week, not as a bad thing, but as a chance to find a bit more of yourself. everything you need to get through this is already inside you my friend, all a psychologist is going to do is help you find it, but nothing is stopping you from searching for yourself you may think im talking out my ass and thats cool. but if you want to chat, drop me an email, or mention my name in a comment and ill come across it.
Peace, Love & Strength brother
Procel
Procel, I appreciate your advice. A lot. But I already know that a therapist isn’t a panacea. I am aware that they can’t solve your problems. But what do you do when your cup is overflowing? You pour out a little off the top. And I’m boiling over already.
And I find it bitterly hilarious that about 80% of the reason why I’m in this place to begin with is because of the cruelty of other people. Because of the way I’ve been treated by others. But I have to save myself. Man. That’s a kicker. They’ll drive you into the hole but they won’t pull you back out. That’s like walking into somebody’s house, smearing dog shit all over their walls, and then acting like you shouldn’t help them clean it up.
If I have to rely entirely on myself, then I know I’m already doomed. The only reason I even “want” to live is because of my religion and other people. I don’t want to burn in Hell and I don’t want to destroy my family and friends. But as for myself? I don’t have any personal interest in my continued existence. I’m trying to live for the sake of everybody else.
I’m not trying to say that you’re wrong. You’re probably right. You’re older than me. No doubt smarter. It’s just that if you are right, then I’m a hopeless case.
Thanks w fish. Can I call u that? Just got a free coffee on my way to work, made me smile. . I call those things silver box’s. Just like a message or comment from a stranger who cares.
Sure. Call me whatever you like. I do get ‘Fish’ a lot.
Silver Boxes…that’s intriguing. I think I might’ve had a word for those things too, at one point. But I can’t remember what it was.
Anyway. Enjoy that coffee.
This honestly makes me so mad at him. I assume he knows how you feel yet in his mind he thinks that a prolonged amount of time from a therapist is quite alright. Tell him to get his priorities straight!
My grandparents aren’t even bad people. They’re good grandparents. Not perfect. I mean, they’ve got problems with their tempers. And with drinking. But they’re better than I deserve, at least. If anything it’s my fault. I hide how I’m doing. They probably don’t even know how bad I’m doing. I was angry when I wrote this, and I still am to a point, but this is my fault.
How can you say that….. I do not entirely know you well but, based on what I have seen you write, you definately deserve a heck of a lot more. Your a super gal!
Thanks, but I am not super. I am a spoiled brat who complains about her grandparents—the people who feed her, clothe her, and let her live with them—online, where they can’t even defend themselves.
You’re not a spoiled brat. You had an expectation to go to an appointment. The appointment didn’t happen. There’s nothing wrong with being upset.
whiskered-fish, Look what cheap fish food and make up have done to you!!!!
Be nice to your grandparents 🙂
Distant is exactly right! Lmao rocketman
Ps sorry you feel that way whiskered 🙁
Thanks, distant. Although it’s hard not to feel spoiled. Most depressives my age don’t even have therapists. Or any kind of support, really.
A week may not seem like a lot to someone who isn’t drowning.
But for someone who’s drowning, and told that the life-preserver is going to be thrown a week late, because of yard work….
Wow.
I’d probably feel disbelief and indignation also.
Your reaction makes sense to me.
I hope you can find ways to make it through the week.
We will be here, and I will be thinking of you.
Thanks Cordless. I know it’s a cliché, but it sure feels like I’m drowning. I wish there was hope but I don’t think there is any. For me, at least.
I hope you’re doing alright. The new icon looks great.
That would piss me off also.. Hang in there as best you can Catfish. That really sucks.. *hugs*
Thanks, man. I will try, I guess. Like always.
Hi.
Sometimes grandparents grew up in a time where mental health wasn’t such a priority. Ages ago, being depressed was often treated like being sad… maybe ‘really’ sad. So perhaps it wasn’t a conscious decision to put your needs second… Maybe they just didn’t fully understand your needs… given their knowledge of how things were.
It’s like when my grandpa used to tell me, “I walked to school 13 miles each way… even in a blizzard.” Times have changed and, in many places, one flurry can shut everything down. However, my grandpa wasn’t trying to be mean… He was just talking from an angle that he understood… outdated or not.
Not sure if this applies…. Just trying to demonstrate that it might not have been deliberately done.
That is a pretty good point, distant road. Thanks.
I think that’s true for my grandfather. Really, really true. Although he tries to understand. Sometimes he does more harm than good. But he tries.
My grandmother, on the other hand, actually is on antidepressants. She doesn’t understand psychotic features, but she understands depression. She has a habit of self-medicating with alcohol, though. That’s her primary coping mechanism.
It’s nog fair for the to decide to postpone your health for the yard. They don’t know everything about you to be able to decide you’ll be fine. Your mental and physical health is #1. But don’t let this set you back in life. Try to make it to next Tuesday the best you can.
Thanks, magnolia. I’ll try my hardest. Like I said, though, I’m doing this for the people who want me to be alive. I am not among those people. I don’t really want to be here anymore, in all honesty.