im sorry

lately I’ve been completely hopeless, alone, and depressed. I feel sorry for everyone in my life, having to deal with me, I’m so pathetic. I cut myself this whole school year and recently my parents found out, they haven’t looked at me the same, i hate feeling pity from others based on the choices i made, I’m such a *****, i don’t deserve the kindness. I’ll never forgive myself on the choices i’ve made, i’m done, done with the self pity, the apologies, the secrets, and most of all I’m done with myself, i can’t even look at myself in he mirror anymore, I’m ugly inside and out. Im also a liar, i can’t stand having to lie about my whole life, even the small things i lie about, i vacant live with it anymore, all the lies being buried on top of each other. So i’ve decided the best solution, death. Not to look for attention or to cause more pain and pity on others, I’m doing it to erase what should have never been created. i don’t know when i am but I’m definitely going to, i’ll either hang myself or drink poison, whatever works better.