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Sleeping methods???

by voiceless

I know that this is probably a stupid thing to ask but can anybody give me any tips and tricks on sleeping? My mom doesn’t want me to get sleeping pills because she thinks that I’ll get addicted to them even though I’ve never had a previous drug addiction, but anyways.. she keeps telling me to search up natural remedies but none of them are working. I go to bed at either 1 or 2 in the morning everyday which lets me get about 3 to 4 hours of sleep on weekdays so if you couldn’t already tell, that’s a big issue.. especially when I’m in class since I constantly doze off. Any type of remedies will do, thanks!


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Morris 5/9/2016 - 11:30 pm

If you’re under 21 don’t read this.

The best way to fall asleep is to get drunk then rub one out. Alcohol and masturbation = falling asleep within minutes. (Without alcohol you might have to spank the monkey 2 or 3 times).

Cordless 5/10/2016 - 12:09 am

I am tempted to try this.

gkks 5/10/2016 - 6:49 am

Yeah. It works.

tryingtohope 5/9/2016 - 11:34 pm

This is a weird idea but have you ever tried audio books. If you get a good one and put it on in bed, it’s like being read to. Before you know it, you doze off. Then the next day, you have to rewind the book to figure out when you fell asleep. Just be sure it’s not a scary or graphic book.

Also, are you heavily caffeinated. You may want to avoid caffeine after 4 pm. Just a thought. And if you need a bedtime snack a turkey sandwich is good. There’s a reason we get sleepy after thanksgiving dinner.

LMK if this helps

Ant 5/10/2016 - 12:19 am

I’d love an audio book of David Attenborough talking, something about his voice knocks me out almost instantly.

nepheliad 5/9/2016 - 11:44 pm

You could try ASMR videos and binaural beats on YouTube (listen with earbud headphones). I find they make me relaxed and fall asleep more easily.
Morris’ technique is a good one too (but skip the alcohol if you have school or work early the next day :p ).

Hazy Day Sunflower 5/10/2016 - 12:04 am

Maybe combine your and morris’s idea no alcohol….

Hazy Day Sunflower 5/10/2016 - 12:01 am

Morris has a good idea sans alcohol.

Morris 5/10/2016 - 12:09 am

Yeah, this is a G-rated website, but c’mon people, orgasms have been getting people to sleep since the dawn of humanity. Men and women both experience benefits from self-love. What the hell is wrong with loving yourself? Nothing. Your body belongs to you, be nice to you.

Hazy Day Sunflower 5/10/2016 - 1:01 am

As I keep saying….love yourself….

Mr Angry-mosta tha time 5/10/2016 - 2:58 am

No way is this G rated, with suicide in the name gotta be PG13 at least right?

nepheliad 5/10/2016 - 4:25 am

I’d agree there… Morris also did not formerly consider the site as G rated, back in the days when he would regale SP readers with graphic tales of his real-life liaisons with prostitutes, escorts, strippers, and Asian masseuses… 😛
(I wrote a couple of adult oriented stories too, and so did some other SP authors, but the board does seem a bit more tame nowadays.)

Night In Atlantis 5/10/2016 - 5:28 am

@ nepheliad. While not condoning the behaviour that you mentioned, it’s important that we feel free to express ourselves. If a certain age group was able to find a suicide site they most likely possess the ability to circumvent censorship if they so choose. Access to information is inescapable, the individual has a choice whether or not to view, participate or delve any further.

@ Mr Angry-mosta tha time. Sadly suicide is ubiquitous and has no age bias.

Mr Angry-mosta tha time 5/10/2016 - 6:35 am

Very true and agreed. Anyone can access just about any information with the internet. And as nepheliad said the content here is very much adult and mature oriented.

Ant 5/10/2016 - 12:13 am

Morris I love your idea lol!!! I have lately thought about combining it with a bit of AEA, who knows I maybe one of the lucky few that accidently never wake up… bonus!! ^_^

Night In Atlantis 5/10/2016 - 2:22 am

Thorough exercise can help, If you are physically exhausted it can be easier to fall asleep. Also try to avoid computers before sleep, it can sometimes take the mind up to three hours to become relaxed enough to fall asleep. Caffeine has already been mentioned. Temperature can be a factor. So can light or dark as it directly effects our circadian rhythm which plays a role in inducing tiredness and sleep. Sometimes it’s a process of experimenting with various methods until you find what works for you. It should hopefully gradually become easier as once you have a set routine your body clock should adjust.

shatterediris 5/10/2016 - 5:04 am

ASMR videos are great (as suggested above) earbuds are needed for that (or headphones if you can comfortably sleep in them) I would recommend just finding a ASMR youtuber you like the voice of and then just trying various things out until you find some sort of thing you enjoy (I personally enjoy heavy scratching noises best) then you can start expanding into videos featuring those sorts of things. Also drugs and alcohol are not a bad choice, but since you’re asking to avoid drugs I doubt either would be okay for you…. Focusing on breathing and just slowing your breathing and breathing very deeply too can also help you relax a bit.

Also a cat…. if you don’t have a cat try to get one. And form a strong bond with it and train it to sleep with you, and cuddle close…. That helps with relaxation too…. Of course don’t do this if you dislike cats…. But then again who dislikes cats? :O
Good luck 😀

Night In Atlantis 5/10/2016 - 5:29 am

Cats do sleep a lot….

Hazy Day Sunflower 5/10/2016 - 7:35 am

And so we come full circle. Like the internet. Sex and cats.

shatterediris 5/10/2016 - 11:13 am

at least it’s not sex with cats yet 😀

voiceless 5/10/2016 - 3:01 pm

Thanks for the input guys, hopefully at least one of these methods work

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