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To hope or not to hope

by turquoise

Every opportunity I had I wasted, every decision I made was the wrong one. Every time I ask myself how I wound up where I am, the answer is always the same: Step by step. It was my own choices that brought me here, and my next choices, whatever they are, will get me out of here. That’s the killer… what I do next is decisive. I either choose not to wait, and abandon hope, or choose to wait, and maintain it. Then I ask… why? Why suffer? Just so I can make money that goes out as quickly as it comes in? To pay for a house that I bought a decade ago and still is worth less than what I owe. I work to make others rich, so do I choose to keep doing that for the rest of my life? Why? Just so the people in my life don’t have a tragedy on their hands? Fuck that, tragedy strikes.



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joeld 5/26/2016 - 1:26 pm

I completely understand. I know it can be really tough. I’m in the same boat. I actually had a house I was renting that was really nice and then lost my job and can’t seem to hold down another one. It sucks when you know you’re making bad choices but can’t seem to stop or change them. It’s hard to know the right answer.

turquoise 5/26/2016 - 2:43 pm

Thanks man. The funny thng is, if you ask anyone to whom I see myself as a disappointment, they would say Im fine. Thats subjective of course, but still I wish I could believe it too.

Dawg 5/26/2016 - 2:13 pm

There is a big difference between “waiting” … and “patience” … “waiting” is passive and defensive while being patient as deliberate and tactical … I can wait from now til the end of time for someone to hand me a million dollars … or I can patiently work my way up through my job, gaining knowledge and experience to either get promoted and more money or to have the necessary skills and experience to land a better job that pays more and has better benefits.

Regarding home values – what your home is “worth” on the market ONLY has relevance if you’re going to SELL your house … if you don’t plan on selling, it’s market value has little meaning. To have a secure home is priceless in the context of having or not having a house.
We don’t work to make other rich – although that is often a collateral side effect – we work to take a piece of their success, to profit off their idea and to patiently learn how to find our own idea and use what we learned from their success.

Tragedies cost money to someone … just sayin’

Everything is all in the perspective you CHOOSE to view it from.

economy dawg

turquoise 5/26/2016 - 2:44 pm

Thats a very interesting perspective… To take some of their wealth. If I werent so defeated and deflated all the time, I might agree 🙂

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