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by JiminyCrispies

So I saw my psychiatrist today and I was somewhat honest with her. I explained how the voices are getting bad and stopping me from focusing (I didn’t mention Bree), despite my mum being in the room.

Turns out I’m going on antipsychotics now. I planned to do research on it, but I can’t for the life of me remember the specific one and I forgot the leaflet at my session. I’m not too worried as much about actually taking the pills anymore, I’m more anxious about the blood tests. Specifically the one I need to have within the next week or so. And then the blood tests every 3 months.

I’m absolutely petrified of needles to the point where it takes several nurses 10-15 minutes to calm me down enough to stop my arms shaking to inject me. The last time I had a blood test was when I was about 5/6, and they were finger pricks. So these will be my first needle blood tests. Fun.

I considered not doing it, but I need to see if the medication will work because I can’t cope on my own with it all anymore. I’m getting my GP to do the blood test considering he knows my medical history and how terrified I am of needles, and he will take the time to calm me down. So I don’t think it will be too horrific of an experience for me.

I didn’t up my fluoxetine, however. I didn’t bring my mood up really as I was to focused on the voices. Besides, apparently I need closer monitoring now with the fluoxetine/antipsychotic combination so I don’t know when it’ll be getting increased as I start the antipsychotics within the next couple of weeks.

I need to do extra therapy with my current therapist for the voices alongside the medication (even though I’ve done that before and it did nothing but make it worse).

As of right now, the voices aren’t too bad as I just had a particularly bad episode about 40 minutes ago and they went away abruptly. So, if Bree doesn’t come back again tonight, I might get a decent amount of sleep.

The upside to the medication will be the drowsiness side effect I am desperate to get – as stupid as it sounds. My lacking of sleep is awful, so anything that will cause me to get some extra sleep (be it through the day or not) is the best news I could hear right now.


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SadPotato 6/22/2016 - 7:03 pm

This is great. I’m happy to hear that you’re going to get medication for the voices. It also sounds like it’s going to go smoothly. You’ll be kicking schizophrenia’s ass in no time.

Hazy Day Sunflower 6/22/2016 - 8:11 pm

I always look forward to your posts. Maybe the medicine will quiet the voices. Do you think you might get lonely with the quiet?

I have “normal” periods where I act like a totally normal person. Just cruise along watching anime, reading manga and having absolutely no batshit crazy urges. It worries me. I worry that I may never get the inspired voices that whisper to me to do this or that. But so far, the “normal” only lasts for short spurts. When I am on medicine they last for long long stretches of time, the only difference being I no longer want the crazy, in fact I think to myself how weird it is to enjoy the crazy.

No idea if that makes any sense. Thinking of you.

LoveDogs 6/22/2016 - 9:30 pm

I think they finally got the diagnosis right with giving you anti-psychosis medication. Took them a long time to figure this out!! I am not a fan of having my blood drawn either. Here is what I do:
1) first of all it does not hurt–like a pin prick. 2) I start talking to the person drawing the blood about sports,weather, news anything to take my mind off of the draw. 3) I think that it is for the best–it is in the best interest of my health. 4) I think of the million people out there who donate blood ( hats off to ya’all ). Best of luck to you Angel.

Soco 6/22/2016 - 10:38 pm

I have been prescribed seroquel before as an anti psychotic and it knocked me out. So im sure whatever u take will assist in the sleep department. I really hope u get some relief.
Take care

metalwarrior665 6/23/2016 - 6:18 am

Antipsychotics should calm you down. I don’t know much therapy for schizo, but i heard you can go to remission with pretty good %

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