Unconditional love

Just when I’ve given in, admitted to myself I give up, that I don’t want to keep fighting, I don’t want to keep living, I can’t take the pain….I see a new picture of you my love. You. In all your beauty, your smile, I see your soul….and although the picture is not for me, and I’m not sure what you’re doing or who you’re with, I see that you’re happy. I can see it shining through. I used to make you that happy….but it’s been a long time since then.

I didn’t want to hurt you before I saw this particular picture, and now that I’ve seen it I’m not sure I can go through with my plan. I don’t want to take away your happiness again, I don’t want to hurt you. My unconditional love is telling me to not take away your happiness….even if it keeps me in this horrible pain I’m in. So the real question is can I keep from hurting you again, can I take this pain, the heartache, the hating myself to save this new found happiness you’ve found without me. My life is already empty, meaningless without you. I dunno if I can do this. It’s too much on me. I don’t want to hurt, and I don’t want to hurt you. Someone help me, I don’t know what to do…..