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What’s the difference…

by Wintergirl

Between being friendly and wanting to be friends?

The reason I ask is because there’s someone in my life who I’ve known for a while, 8-9 months and we can easily have conversations and this person is always definitely friendly.

I would say I want to be friends but being the mostly antisocial freak that I am I don’t know when people actually want to be friends with you too. I’m also too old to be obsessing about stuff like this. I enjoy talking with her though. I know I could just take it as it is and see what happens. Other than that I’ve got nothing.

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joeld 6/2/2016 - 8:33 pm

It can definitely be challenging. I always think I know and then botch it. It can be really hard to not have any friends so I hope it works out for you.

Wintergirl 6/2/2016 - 8:43 pm

I have a good feeling about it. But like you said about botching it up, I do that. That’s why I’m so unsure. I definitely don’t want to screw this up.

shatterediris 6/2/2016 - 8:40 pm

I normally just latch onto the people who are being friendly to me really hard, and eventually they become friends…. Do you has their phone number? If so that’s probably a good sign…. a better sign if they don’t always ignore your texts…. that’s generally how I determine if they are a friend of mine or not….

Wintergirl 6/2/2016 - 8:51 pm

No phone numbers have been exchanged at this point.

nepheliad 6/2/2016 - 9:00 pm

It’s better to talk face-to-face anyway, you only need a phone number to arrange times to meet up, or if you have a pressing question to ask that can’t wait until the next time you see them. Personally, I’ve really only had text conversations with boyfriends, love interests, and occasionally friends who lived far away. So yeah, there’s no need to have local friendships ruined by misunderstandings caused by text messages or emails. Heh.

shatterediris 6/2/2016 - 9:47 pm

also to make sure they don’t run away, having someones phone number makes things feel more permanent to me….

nepheliad 6/2/2016 - 10:17 pm

@shatterediris
…I’m not sure about that, I’ve throw out a lot of phone numbers that were given to me when I was at bars, and avoided the calls or texts. 😛 They were all strangers though.

shatterediris 6/2/2016 - 10:35 pm

well then those people would know that you’re not their friend…. Normally if I get ignored 4 times in a row I stop bothering them…. But if they don’t ignore me that means I have a means of contacting them so we can’t loose track of each other 😀

nepheliad 6/2/2016 - 8:42 pm

Don’t you have a live-in boyfriend? If so, don’t say you have “nothing.” 😛 (Many people aren’t lucky enough to have a significant other.)

If you know her IRL, ask her to go out to have lunch with you (or an after-work dinner on the weekend) somewhere nice, but with a casual atmosphere, then make it a regular thing where you hang out like once a week, or every couple weeks, or once a month, if you both have the time.

At some point maybe invite her to your place and chill, eat snacks, and watch comedies or something. (If you’re comfortable doing so. If not just stick to hanging out outside of the house.)

I dunno, that’s just how I used to make friends with other females. If you don’t extend the invitation, you won’t know if they want to be friends or not.

Wintergirl 6/2/2016 - 8:50 pm

Yes I do. When I say I got nothing I meant I don’t know what to do in regards to this situation.

You are right I need to extend some sort of invitation to hang out. Grabbing lunch sometime is nothing crazy. I just gotta do it. I just get nervous about these sort of things I guess.

rocketman 6/2/2016 - 8:53 pm

You go for it! Trough yourself out there, you have nothing to lose, and everything to gain, don’t get crazy though! 🙂 I love to talk to talk to people, about everyday life, i find most of the time i’m giving advice on here, but i like to talk with someone everyday, talk about daily stuff not just wanting to die!! ha ha! , say hello, look forward to talking to that person everyday, say good morning, and shoot the shit a little, if anybody is interested here’s my email recycling10000 @gmail.com.

rocketman 6/2/2016 - 8:53 pm

through 🙂

rocketman 6/2/2016 - 8:54 pm

i don’t think that’s right either? such a dummy! throw 🙂

Wintergirl 6/2/2016 - 9:24 pm

I figured it out. Darn spell check. I will go for it. I definitely don’t get crazy though! Far from it…it may take me a while to work up the nerve to even suggest hanging out but I will!

rocketman 6/2/2016 - 9:28 pm

Good for you! You only get what effort you put out. people are couscous to couscous nothing ventured nothing gained.

rocketman 6/2/2016 - 9:50 pm

Wintergirl
Tostadas tonight! big one’s! i have to clean behind my ear’s after i eat them!

Wintergirl 6/2/2016 - 10:53 pm

Lmao. I had a burrito for dinner.

rocketman 6/2/2016 - 10:56 pm

Wintergirl, now that’s funny! we have something in common, and think a like. 🙂 i had green chilies burritos last night! awesome!

rocketman 6/2/2016 - 10:59 pm

Wintergirl, tomorrow is prime rib! i have a very rich friend that made a bet with me and lost, the deal was to buy a big prime rib and bring it to me tomorrow 🙂

shatterediris 6/2/2016 - 11:11 pm

yay ^_^ food that other people buy is always better…. and prime rib is pre good 😀

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