Every time I hear someone has died, or someone has lost someone special to them, not only do I feel sorrow for the person in mourning because they are in unbearable pain, but I feel sorrow because my life should have been taken, not theirs. Why must the “good die young” and if that is true, then is this earth truly hell? What must I do to be called to heaven? Isn’t my pain here enough? Isn’t it a cruel irony that suicide is a selfish act? Wouldn’t it be a mercy? Why must good be taken so early, and why must those who are in pain remain here? I would gladly do what I can to preserve someone’s happiness and have my life taken so that they can have more time with the one’s they love. I don’t know if there’s anyone out there who would really mourn me. I fantasize about my funeral all the time, but I don’t know…does anyone hear me?
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i have been through similar thoughts. I have been through thoughts of wondering why I didnt die instead of somebody else. I have been through that. but I have come to realize that life is a good thing and that so long as we are alive we should do our best to truly live and be thankful for what we have and thankful for the opportunities we have while we are alive. I also believe that learing to be thankful and also to learn to be good to other people is a huge part of why we are here.
I believe that we are all individually here to learn and to grow as a person and that sometimes > were not allowed to leave until we grow in some ways. I keep this in mind daily and try to learn the lessons that life seems to be teaching me each day.
I wish the best for you. I hope you live a long life and that things get better for you in every area of your life. I do believe there will be more people to mourn when you pass then you think.
I wish you the best.
I don’t think life is any good or bad, it’s just a coincidence.
I too feel the same when someone passes away so about your question yes I mourn when you die
Funny thing is this just happened to a long time friend I knew that died from an accident this weekend and his family are yet to be informed which I don’t want to imagine the pain his wife and 3 children will feel. Also some grandchildren of a family member less than 7 years died in a car accident traveling for vacations and I mean c’mon how can children die in such tragic ways and I can barely grab any item and do it with less pain than these poor souls? I guess this only motivates me to attempt it more whenever tragedies like these happen where loved ones leave while your still here burying them and feeling worse about yourself for not having been there for them and taking their place.
My teacher once said that god made us because he wanted somebody to love, and I always found that so selfish. If god really exists and that is the real reason of why we are here, then he is the most selfish thing in the universe. He just wants toys, he only wants us to “love” us. He doesn’t care if we’re suffering a living hell or live with constant despair, he just wants us “there”, he’s no different to those people that don’t want us to die because they need us “there”, not because they care about us. That’s why I think, whoever put us in this existence is the most selfish creature of the universe and I hate them.
The dead are at peace while we are forced to exist here