It’s been quite a long time since I visited this site last time but things got kinda worse and so I couldn’t even manage to write something here, I was more or less all time just laying in my bed doing nothing but thinking about my worthless life. How I messed things up again. More and more I began realizing that I am by far a bigger problem for others and also myself than I assumed before. I don’t even know anymore how the heck I got to such a point in my life.
But now I’ve got vacation and I pushed myself, thinking – no – knowing it can’t go on like this. I’m a burden to everyone in my life, I mess up with everything and one, then I try harder, just to fail eventually again, thus things get worse and when things get worse I lose control and when I do that I fail even more, things get even more worse and when they get worse I fail even more and …. yeah, I guess you know what I want to say here. Sooo I tried to search for things that help when I’m completely down again, ready to die or for severe self-harm or whatsoever.
Well, certainly I also found out some, I really hope if you guys read this and you didn’t know them before they might help you too:
I. Shooter games/also other computer games (One of my best working methods so far though)
II. extremly spicy things (Wasabi/Chilli) or just chocolate :3
III. horror movies or my favourite series or watch funny stuff
IV. a long walk with my dog through the woods where no one’s around and by chance just scream out my feelings WITHOUT strange looks from others
V. ice-cold bath (even though it doesn’t work most times as I can’t bring myself up to do this much anymore)
VI. torture a puppet that looks like me, rather that I made look like myself (if not given, a photo (or perhaps a drawing) also works for me even though not that good) ((a person here gave me this amazing advice by the way, so thanks again to her/him ^^))
VII. read my best book/Manga
VIII. draw (other hobbies)
IX. just writing down my feels or what makes me feel sad/angry/hopeless, etc. either here or only for myself
X. put marbles/little stones in my shoes
XI. flick a rubber band on my wrist (even though it’s not working well for me, to be honest)
XII. make a list of positive things that happend
XIII. throw something around/destroy old unimportant stuff (like newspaper or something)
XIV. cuddle with my stuffed animals ~
XV. listen to music (Metal!)
Well, so this were the things I came up with, so if you didn’t know them yourself already, I hope, as mentioned before, they help you too 🙂
And if you have some other skills you (or the internet) came up with I’d be really grateful if you shared those.
But anyways, Thank ya all for reading though and I hope you are all doing fine.
2 comments
I like this post. I don’t self harm personally, but I think it’s a nice list of coping mechanisms. You have a lot of nice ways of distracting yourself. Those could work for pretty much anyone who is depressed.
Thanks a lot, I appreciate your response and I’m really happy to hear (or rather read) that you like it and see it that way.
And yeah, those skills certainly helped me out quite often though, it’s really useful most times when things are going bad again.