Everyday crying to bed, was something I always would end up doing. It was always about the past I had went through, the little joys of life i was devoid of. A normal family was all I wanted, but sadly never got it.
As I grew I learnt it the hard way. Sometimes, only you can help yourself. I tried and erased the past from my mind, now when I look back , I can see what had happened but it just seems like a hollow memory.
the memory became hollow and so did I, it felt like walking around with a wall around me. I could only see what was outside but couldn’t perceive much. It felt better than crying everyday, slowly this hollowness consumed me. I wanted to run away from it, bad sadly it was too late.
Now even though the memory has faded, yet again my eyes everyday, turns mushy. Again I am crying every night, this time only for this whole thing to end. Wanting peace every night, wanting to let everything go and fly away from all this is all I want.
I wish I had the strength and courage that takes to do it, but sadly I don’t. I don’t want to be stuck in this state forever. All I can do is pray someway, fate would listen to me and take me away.
2 comments
Would it not just be nice
if one could only sit and cry in bed,
until the tears formed a stream,
the stream became a river, to carry one away,
floating on top like the nice little hollow log one is,
swept away all the way out to the sea
to disappear in the ocean horizon as the sun beautifully sets over the salty sea of tears
Your words make the whole thing look nice, but in reality its nowhere near that.