I almost jumped from a or 7 story parking garage in Connecticut two years ago when I ran away from my home after trauma and school induced stress broke me. Here I am, a little more adult, but much worse off. Ive been trying to find a way to end it without letting myself twart it. Im going to stock up on downers tonight, and make the trip tommorow. I’ll post again before if I choose to do it.
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that’s my plan as well possibly next month or February…all depends on how something plays out. anyway that’s been my concern too that I’ll chicken out. I’ve visited the parking deck multiple times now but still have to get over the instinctual fear of going through with it.
I think I’m just going to blindfold myself and dive off. I have accepted the height, the courage to throw myself off has been what made me so reluctant to do it all this time trying other pointless methods. I am going to imagine diving into a pool. i have very vivid memories of diving at a military pool as a child. I also have a strong imagination. Hopefully the two could combine and convince me for at least long enough to jump that I will dive into a pool. Headfirst is the way to go too, so if I jump as a dive, I won’t have anything to cushion the blow. That’s why so many people fail. Can’t look, just dive, and keep swimming
I have read some tips on jumping and to make it more likely to be successful but hadnt heard about being blindfolded. That would be helpful for sure. Sounds very peaceful when you put it that way. I planned on having headphones in listening to a favorite song etc.
Yeah, I figure if I blindfold myself near enough the edge that I know where to jump, it takes away from the in-the-moment panic.
What type of downers are you planning to use? How much?
I don’t really know yet. I was working all night and didn’t have time to think about what and who and where. Honestly, depression, alcohol, and my thoughts are enough to push me into a suicidal fit. Doing that on location might be enough, but it’s just too far away to go to on a regular basis.
In all seriousness, probably enough alcohol to be just under stumbling drunk, a bowl, and a hit of alkyl nitrate just before I jump. If I’m blindfolded, nitrates really help me get into my imagination, when combined with other substances.