every 40 seconds someone in the world dies by suicide.
every 40 seconds i wish i was one of those people.
i wake up and look at myself in the mirror and hate who i am. i hate my skin, clothes, body face; you name it. it wasnt always like this, really. i used to be so fun and joyful and happy.. what happened? i would die to go back to those times when i loved myself, when i was content with life, when i smiled every day. my life feels like a series of unfortunate events, just happening one after another. its funny because from an outsiders perspective i have it all, im seemingly perfect. why cant i just appreciate this and be happy with myself? i ask myself this every day and i still dont have an answer. im worthless. im nothing. im another collection of atoms in this universe
17 comments
I feel the same but forgive me I believe that you are off by 25 sec because it’s every 15 seconds that someone commits suicide. I was planning to make a post about this with the statistics
It’s every 40 seconds globally I believe
http://www.cnn.com/2014/09/05/world/who-global-suicide-report/
Mine is from 2015 I’m still looking for the link
Crap I can’t find it everything is from 2014
Somebody get a stopwatch!
I know I read it last week I’m still looking through my recent google searches and url website
Yeah, I actually like who I am now. BUT I Hate who i used to be and the pain of having to remember all the stupid things I have done in the past brings me grief.
If I could erase my past right now… and erase some things that I did a long time ago from the minds of people who knew me back then. Then I could just be the good person I am now and move forward in life and have things go awesome.
but some people who know about stupid things and embarrassing things I did a long time ago.
they know about it… and whenever my name pops up in conversation some of them talk about it and it causes me pain and causes me to want to run and hide in the bushes and never come out to be around people anymore.
I dug my life into a social hole some years ago and its hard to pull out of it and redeem myself in the eyes and minds of some people
when some people know about bad things or sleezy things or embarrassing things you did a long time ago… some of them never want to let you forget it.
they will bring that shit up every time they see you…. every time your name pops up in conversation and its hurtful.
Now I have social anxiety and jsut want to live as a recluse for the rest of my life
As recently as seven years ago, every time I retrieved a bad memory I would wince. A serious wince. People would comment on it. Now I just sigh. Progress!
I think that if anyone was really serious about suicide, they’d drown themselves. It’s really the fastest, easiest way to go and it’s guaranteed to work unless someone saves you within a few minutes.
Yes you will suffocate, you’ll feel pain as your lungs fill with water and perhaps panic. But you’ll die fairly fast, in a matter of seconds perhaps a minute or two at most. Of course it’s no one’s preferred method, certainly not mine but I’d do it if I was desperate, couldn’t find a better way.
Plus if you take a bunch of sleeping pills, get drunk, then you probably won’t feel it as much. Incidentally I nearly drowned once in school trying to tread water-definitely not a fun experience-but still better than many other means.
I’m not encouraging anyone-just saying that there are surefire ways of finding death without jumping off a bridge or drinking chemicals or doing other stupid shit that’s unreliable and can leave you severely injured or paralyzed.
And to address your post-I think many of us here are very dissatisfied with our lives that was forced on us by our parents. It boils down to what you want to do about it. If you were happy in the past, then you need to see what went wrong in your life and try to fix it if you can assuming you want to keep living.
Like you I’ve had some good times and bad times also-not happy with my looks either but I decided a while back I wanted to keep living for a while and enjoy the time I have left in my life. I’m also going to work on getting back in shape/improving myself-but not yet as I have other bigger issues to take care of first. So long as my life is “ok” I’m going to try to make it better.
But if it goes to shit and I have nothing to live for then I’ll plan for my death. Thinking about it now, I’d rather be euthanized by doctors since they have anesthetics and the right meds to terminate you peacefully. It really should be legalized in all countries-we suffer enough in life, why force us to suffer more when we just want to die? We treat animals with more compassion than we do people.
they are afraid to see how many people are willing to die. those movements, politics, rants barely talks about the suicade right’s. they think everything can be fixed with some psychiatrist and pills. lets say its true. everything has a sollution. so what ? like no one ever do mistakes, like there is no bad marriage, bad choices. i want my share from freedom to make mistake by choosing a peaceful death.
but no. i must choose life then do mistakes. wish i was a horse with a broken leg.
i agree with you. its hard because those of us who want to die have tried at one point or another to fix the shitty situation that were in. its when youre trying so hard and wasting all this time and energy and things just keep getting worse its almost like whats the point? ive tried and ive fought but nothing is changing so why should i suffer? i should be able to choose what i want to do with my life, and if its causing me agony i should be allowed to do what i please with it
The one I never actually considered was drowning. Just never goes into my mind when I’m researching methods. Even the train was considered before that. I thought it was closer to 4 minutes before unconciousness, and I’d have to weigh myself down with something. I think there’s a difference between cold water drowning and hot water drowning in that you can still be resusitated in cold water even if you’ve been under for a long time.
Wow, that title caught me. I HATE myself. Im fairly certain I always have yet I wasnt aware, as I get my value from other people. I get it if I feel they like me or via projecting what I think they feel. Im eternally negative and its all to the point now where I just dont care.
I just want it to be over
i feel you. on the outside im so bubbly and “happy” because i internalise it all. i always think to myself, “why cant i be good enough?”
i agree with you. its hard because those of us who want to die have tried at one point or another to fix the shitty situation that were in. its when youre trying so hard and wasting all this time and energy and things just keep getting worse its almost like whats the point? ive tried and ive fought but nothing is changing so why should i suffer? i should be able to choose what i want to do with my life, and if its causing me agony i should be allowed to do what i please with it
My frustration comes from not getting what I feel I deserve from people or life in general. I don’t hate myself at all, in fact I think and know I am a really good person with a lot of value and much to give. I don’t care much what other people think of me, if they like me or not, they don’t have any say on my self worth. I just wonder why I get overlooked and others are chosen instead? Or the ones that do choose me are so intensely bad for me…. rarely works out in my favor…. time and time again…. why?