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My death option is killing me

by SkareKrow

I am stuck. I was recently dignosed with moderate borderline severe emphysema. To a regular person this is a wake-up and they would adjust their lifestyle to live longer. Me on the other hand I’m looking 3-5 depending on how much I smoke and how little I exercise. My current junction the last option I currently want. It’s the way I have felt for 15 years. I am also dignosed bipolar that is untreated and even treated I find it hard to find happiness in my life. My catch is right now no one relies on me. What if in that 3-5 years circumstances change. Then I’m stuck with an even worse situation. I mean last 15 it hasn’t changed. If anything it has become worse. I really don’t have anyone to talk to about this. The one semi friend I spoke to I just threw out there I’m not changing my lifestyle and taking the punches that come with it. He calls it selfish. To me forcing someone to live a life that has never made them happy to keep those you cross paths with happy is selfish.

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Mf 1/24/2017 - 5:51 am

That’s a risk you have to take i guess. Either you risk taking care of yourself to live more or just going due to neglecting your health, only you can make that choice (it sounds like an awful way to go tho). I agree with the selfishness in wanting to keep someone alive, but maybe your semi-friend does see some hope for you. As i see it, you lose nothing by taking care of yourself and waiting a while, you can always find a way out if things don’t work, but you can’t exactly revive from death if something happens near the end.

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