Recent bereavement after a bad illness, I was with em practically every day through life, so it’s hit like a cannon.
OCD
Social Phobia/Agrophibia-Lost a lot of years to it. Lot of bad memories from it as well.
Depression.
Constant minutely suicidal thoughts which I aint been able to follow through on yet, and fear of not being to fucking do it.
Probable alcoholism caused by the bereavment, had to get out my mind for a while every day or I’d have gone mad.
A future that I can’t even contimplate, so I need to get the fuck out of here.
Im sure some of you can beat on some on this, but I dont think all of you can.
3 comments
Hi Woody
I’m right there with you. Losing someone who is your soul is pain beyond what words can describe.
It’s also a pain that brings all of our other hurts up so as to make them intolerable.
And that’s how we got here.
I don’t know your life story so I can’t say for you, but for me I am a failure. Losing my Beloved is a result of my failed existence.
For you,since you have social issues, mabey if you got therapy you could get more comfortable and maybe being Aroubd others might help you.
I don’t have social anxiety issues so I know socializing or people won’t help me not be what I am.
But you might have hope to a less painful life.
What do you think?
“I’m right there with you. Losing someone who is your soul is pain beyond what words can describe.”
Probably the greatest and most accurate sentence I have read in a while and describes my situation perfectly.
It questions the whole point of wanting to stay here to stay alive. You want to shut off the lights and call it it a life.
I’m so. Ret sorry MissingMy3Hearts.ive read your story on your posts but haven’t replied because I hope for you.i hope that you get visitation so you get to see 2 of your three hearts at least sometimes. And I hope that you meet someone who becomes your 4th heart. I really hope this for you. But I didn’t know if posting it would hurt you so I didn’t post it. I hope it’s ok that I told you this