The conversation is deep from 2:00 – 3:25
I wonder what you guys think the video ends on 3:25
Is it true we don’t know who we are until the moment before death are we different from other animals?
share your suicide story
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Very good find Sadlife.
I think our true pure essence will come at at the time we die.
Hope you are doing ok today
Thank you 1FineDay I really like your username because all I ask of this life is that 1 fine day to change already half of the things that’s going on just half is all. And thanks I truly hope your doing OK as well you seem very happy on your words but I know that your hurt and limited like me. Stay strong 🙂
Hi Sadlife
I know you’re younger than me I’m in my 30s. 20s are really hard because most people feel like they are failures. So I think a good game plan for 20’s is to regroup until you get comfortable. Don’t search for pure bliss. Just comfort. And tackle a couple of those things at a time til you knock them down and you feel more at peace. I’ve done that in the past and it helped tremendously see I’m still here.
Is it your job or what bothers you?
Yeah that’s right you probably read someone of my comments so you understand some about me thanks so yeah I’m 26 people it has gotten serious in terms of debt. My job is a little part of it because a lot of the employees are either a relative or are from the country where my parents are from and they give me this evil look because I’m being me and I’m different who doesn’t have a dad so they expect a lot from me in both work and behavior but I smile and act silly to piss them off or I wear some anime stuff I love anime a lot I collect figures that represent my loneliness. I don’t have a dad he passed away when I was 17 my dad a had a load of debt and my mom took it on because she wanted to keep the house and the mortgage, taxes and insurance on this fuckin house is what the average person makes in a month this doesn’t include utilities or repair maintenance then you need a car because that’s what you need when living in CT I’m like come on we lost two of my dad’s residential property’s because my mom took all the profit and used it to pay the mortgage on the house I agreed to help her when she borrowed money from a family friend and from my uncle they both know how serious I am about paying back I gave everything to my mom thousands ontop of what was borrowed just to not lose one of the buildings because she promised that she’d give it to me for all I’ve been through and all that I sweated I renovated apartments I fixed everything I’m extremely handy and all I saved and gave is gone she lied she still took the profit and used it on the house we barley have anything now we owe half on the house and my mom refuses to sell it if she did all debts would be covered so now I’m broke heavy I’m $85K in debt I make $400 a week I now I can’t pay one bill I’m paying lawyer fees from the property’s my mom has no credit card debts I paid them all she works to but it’s all for the house and I have some cash that I had saved up for years for my school that I am planning to pay back to my family friend that lent us money it’s a lot but still not enough all because of this fuckin house why did I chose this I’m just soo lonely I knew if I moved I’d be alone I have a little brother that I like to smile when I see but he is obsessed over the house OMG my older sister to. I have no friends I’m just handsome for nothing I have never had a girlfriend my close friend left me long ago I was scammed a lot of money online no one cares I buy a TV for my mom I paid off her credit card debts she can’t even help me when I need it. I can’t do nothing I beg my car not to brake down I litterly beg. I hate seeing people my age especially at work all of the guys my age have a girlfriend everything is simple no debts even if so it controllable with ease and no problem. All of them have school they don’t have to worry they had a good childhood me I was abused I was heavily bullied at school I was at one of the worst school in NYC and I was the only white boy in class. But I never ever was suicidal until my dad passed away not because of my dad dieing but because I right away saw what kinda life I am going to have especially when I needed to give my mom money all the time. But I feel bad for my mom because my dad treated her like shit he never trusted her he did a lot of stuff behind her back that I can’t mention incase my comment is discovered if I kill myself so that sympathy is why I helped. I’m OK with being used and stuff being soft and stomped on but being lonely is one thing but being broke is another if I could chose I’d honestly want to have a girlfriend over money or any other thing. I hate this it hurts
Oh and my mood, always awful. Always praying for death. And planning. Preparing my mind.
Oh yeah and my mood is always like yours. If something does go wrong I just say “ah no problem I am gonna *** pretty soon”
That’s sadly comical
Oh Sadlife
We are somewhat similar
My dad died when I was young too
I helped my Mom too
My Mom is sneaky too and bad
She abused us too
I’m sorry you had such a sad life
I wish it were better for you handsome one
Why not just get a girlfriend then
Make sure you get a girlfriend who has a job and leave that fuckin house
Then you move in with the new girlfriend
And if that goes wrong you find another one and go with her
You didn’t not need to stay there anymore
Tell them you feel that if you don’t leave, you will kill yourself and walk out and go
Don’t look back
Live your life
Just keep going til you find the right one
It in the end you need to do what you feel in your heart
Is it your life mission to help your family?
Or do you want to try to live without supporting them?
Thanks 1fineday it is always nice to talk to you I’m sorry about your dad and I’m sorry about that long comment.
“problem is I never had a girlfriend so I don’t know how to go out there and get one that is an impossible mission. 🙂 only dreams but I’ll try.
And that’s for the time and explaining things
Thanks*
We are very similar high five*
High five handsome one
It’s easy to get a girlfriend
Say you like Russian girls, or whatever
Maybe they go to a certain church
You can meet them there
Or online
You’re good at that
Many people have trouble interacting in person
They prefer online
So you’re not alone
Maybe find a love coach or something and join match.com and start dating. Or eharmony.com
But find girls you have things in common with maybe similar nationality I find help S sometimes, and since your handsome you should find someone pretty, and nice like you
They should have a job
And you two will be great
No reason to feel suicidal
You’re life can turn around if you work on it
So far I don’t hear anything that sounds so bad that you can’t improve it with time and effort
I promise
Ahh I fell asleep. Anyways 1FineDay I appreciate you a lot especially these reply’s of yours. And I noticed that I did not answer your question and it is not my life long dream to support them I happen to be the only one capable to take it all upon it because my father’s last words to me was to take care of them and I always had to give up everything that I made $$$ even through the summers that I worked in my early teens all of it was given to my dad everything even Christmas gifts that I received well that I gave away to him it was a few months before he passed away. I did a lot. I was 17 finished honor rolls took over my dads job as a superintendent in a residential building for 3 years but still all of it came into a disaster all in the end I barley got anything now if it was last year I could had moved I had enough rent money to keep me going for 2 years no problem but like I told you i gave that hard earned sweat money to help my mom and what’s fucked up is the house isn’t even in my moms name my dad never trusted us enough to do that see fuckin shit it is finally approved by probate after paying off thousands of my dad’s debts see no escape. I always wanted to try and live on my own without supporting my family but it hurts to do it it hurts for my life to be in control while they suffer because of stupidity of that home that my mom wants. She even uses my little brothers social security that he gets every month because of my dad all for the mortgage. I tell her to not use it and to move away from the house and save that money for when my brother goes to college but she ignores me. She works and uses everything for that house my school money that I saved my brothers social security and the money from the buildings that we no longer have hahahah I don’t know what to do. Plus OK on the side I’m single and I’m damaged I don’t hang out at al, all I do is watch anime and have people stare at my at work like I’m a devil. And I’ll check out match.com and eharmony for me these things are painful I don’t meet too many people like me I see only people who have things a place where they belong everything is given to them with ease and no problem. Trust me 1fineday it is a powerful reason to be suicidal So what’s suicidal for me might not be suicidal for others it’s all in how effective your coping resource is. And too much time is being wasted people are cruel, greedy and judmental. Torture execution, sadist people effect me as well I wish I can do something useful and be in love.Now to all those girls I tried to talk to and be with shame on them because I would have been everything for them my devotion would be for her damn them damn it all people who lie and look away when it matters
I totally understand
And you’re right
I used to be one who looked away
I helped financially but looked away at pain my loved one endured
Then I lost him
My Beloved
So I understand
I’m sorry I said that it doesn’t sound like you can’t overcome it
I know everyone has their own threshold. I guess I just hope happiness comes to you
If there is heaven you will be there for your heart and sacrifices
I wish I had a magic solution
I’m sorry
Oh no you gave me ideas far more than anyone could I can’t thank you enough and your basically the only one who replied on the sp. You are a good person and many people like myself should talk with people like you more often. I’m so sorry about your beloved and to be honest I don’t mind any type of girls accept for the girls from my country they think that there too cool and crap I see those types everywhere I can’t stand it same goes for Albanian girls Bosnian
Thank You Sadlife
I hope a good woman comes your way
You deserve it
Thanks 🙂 you remind me of a user that I used to talk to here her user name was hazy day sunflower. She’s down to earth very sweet honest and was so good at handing advices IDK where she is now I just hope things are good her way. Last time I spoke to her was in March. I think your new here right because I remember you saying something about that for a while you were reading comments and now your coming out to reply
Yes I’m new just started posting
I was numb all my life until I lost my Beloved
Now I feel all pain and it’s too much
You sound more positive today that’s good
How long have you been on here?
I send you love
Yes thank you for noticing I am positive today. Me I have been here for a year now I’ve been here for a year now. I’m sorry you feel that I really do and I to send you love
This reminds me of the moment in Batman: The Dark Knight when the joker says “Do you want to know why I use a knife? Guns are too quick. You can’t savor all the… little emotions. In… you see, in their last moments, people show you who they really are. So in a way, I know your friends better than you ever did. Would you like to know which of them were cowards?”
Haha joker that sounds like him. And I figured you watched naruto, itachi is the best the kind of pain that character had to endure. Sure I’d like to know which of them were cowards
I already know what kind of person I am because I can imagine perfectly what I would do at the moment of my death. I am a rage filled person… I would probably just lash out in rage at the joker at the moment of my death… and, yeah, I like Naruto. 🙂
Haha hey you know what I found out this was the last scene of kisame because we all know that he died from being eaten by the sharks but they could of added him in the reanimation jutsu from kabuto. Anyways the reason they didn’t do the reanimated version of kisame is because the voice actor Dan had died this was in 2013 he was 50 I think it had to do with some health issue so this was his last scene that he played