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People are selfish

by Isolated

Life was going well. I was coping. Yes there are still weeks where it’s hard and the depression and anxiety completely takes over but I was handling it. But now I’m not.

Most days I am anxious and depressed for no particular reason. But now my mind won’t switch off and it’s making everything ten times worse and I don’t want to leave the house, I don’t want to see my family for Easter. I just want to dissapear.

I am a loyal person. I drove 3 hours after uni/work all day just for a friends birthday. On my birthday she didn’t even bother to show up because she was too tired, despite the fact that she had to drive past my house to get home. My other friends hang out without me and don’t invite me because I may be busy. Despite the fact that they know I would reschedule anything for them. I just feel like I am constantly running around after everyone and no one would even consider doing the same for me.

My best friend started dating my other best friend. I have been alone all the time. Then my best friend told me on the weekend that he thought he has feelings for me and kissed me. But now I have barely heard from him sense. And I just feel worse and worse.

People are selfish, unloving and cold. No one cares anymore. So why should I care for them.


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Vanman 4/14/2017 - 7:10 am

Friendship has been said to be overrated. “Friends” can be fickle and sometimes you really don’t know who they are and what their true motives are. Some writers have said it’s better to have enemies than friends because it hurts less when you get back-stabbed. At least you expected that from an enemy…

And selfishness, yeah, that’s like the “original sin” of humanity. Selfishness is what causes most of the world’s problems, (IMO). You’re probably “guilty” of “caring too much.” As sad as it sounds, if you’re going to care too much, you can’t expect anything in return. So you can expect to be taken advantage of at every opportunity. That’s why Eastern thought has always said things like ‘compassion is it’s own reward’, etc. I think suicidal people probably care too deeply and feel things too deeply and don’t know how to cope with our overly-extreme selfish world.

So some of the ways people have found to cope (besides medication, drugs and alcohol, and suicide) is to give yourself a deeply religious or basic philosophical reason to care, or, to just stop caring altogether, (like you mentioned). I’ve used all three at different points in my life with varying degrees of success. Today, I just don’t care, (usually.) If I do something for someone else because of caring, compassion, or just being a decent human, I never expect any reciprocation.

Not sure if any of this helps, it’s just my take on what you’re saying.

Isolated 7/20/2017 - 9:54 am

I know you wrote this a fair while ago, but thank you. I guess at the time I posted this I still had hope that the people around me would change (despite the fact that their behaviour has been the same for years). I was being naive. I can now see the situation from your point of view and you’re right. I guess I try not to care like you do but it’s hard. So good effort to you for not caring majority of the time because I now understand how hard it is to not care. How ironic is that… We have to put in so much effort not to care…

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