I’m thinking that I’m just gonna leave notes for each individual person (Mom, Dad, and sister) and then actually leave a journal type thing of poems or thoughts or things like that. *Please don’t tell me this is the stupidest fucking thing in the world (the journal). I know it is* Anyway, I was gonna put this in it…
My soul has left my body now
But please don’t be sad
Keep the memory of me alive
When I was smiling and glad
Many die of old age
Some are stolen before their time
I chose to take my own life
Is that such a crime?
I’ve been very miserable
With every breath I take
It hurts to stay alive, you see
Life for me is not a piece of cake
I hope you understand
I can’t go on like this
Every night I dream of heaven
A place of peace and bliss
I know that this will hurt you
I hope one day your tears will cease
Just know that your baby girl
Can finally rest in peace
3 comments
That is a poetic summary of what many people undoubtedly struggle to communicate. They are your thoughts, expressed in your words. I think it’s original, not that I’ve read a single suicide note, but still.
If I found a loved ones journal detailing thoughts and feelings and reasons why they committed suicide, I think I’d want to keep it, for a good period of time, reading and re-reading it until I could put some sense to the situation. I think it’s a good idea. And a bad one, too, as it can also be a difficult thing for them to reconcile, but like I said, I’d rather have it than not.
Suicideisnotachoice, last year, this was me. Your journal is not a stupid idea. Your thoughts, feelings and words are more valuable than you know. You have such a beautiful life ahead of you, that writing is unbelievable…it brings tears to my eyes. I can imagine how beautiful of a soul you have and trust me – you have OPTIONS. Email me – I am willing to sit and explain to you everything that turned my life upside down. I was living in pain, immense pain, and could no longer go on with my life because I was bed ridden at that point. But then all of a sudden there was hope, and a year and a half later, I’m here and pretty happy. I look back and think how sure I was that I was going to die. It’s not the only option. Email me, Skype me, anything, I really really want to talk to you. I’m here to listen, for you to rant to, anything. <3 frozenmangos1@gmail.com
1. I don’t have a beautiful soul.
2. I don’t have any options.
3. I’ve tried 3 times, each time I was scared and I asked for God’s forgiveness after the second time, and the 3rd time I heard a voice in my head say “Stop. Just stop. I love you. It’ll be okay”. I was 1/8th of an inch from my carotid. How… am I still alive.
4. I believe in God, and if He’s the God I know, He will not judge me for taking my life because He knows how much pain I’m in. He won’t judge ANY of my sins because Jesus is my Lord and He died to save me from the penalty of my sins.