How Do You Move On When…

How do you move on when you know that the failure of a relationship is 100% your fault? When you don’t love yourself enough to be loved by someone else? When you push the person that is trying to give you love away? How do you forgive yourself? How do I move on when I know that right now I could still be in an amazing relationship if I just allowed myself to be vulnerable and open. I hated myself so much that I thought he could do better. And now I think he has found better. I’ve been stalking his Facebook page, like I said that I wouldn’t, sue me, I broke. But he has been flirting with a new girl and she seems amazing. The thing about it is she doesn’t seem too much different than me. From her profile, I totally want to be her friend myself. She seems kick ass. There is a potential relationship between them blossoming. Maybe. I know him. He’s doing the same thing he did with me. He’s being such a gentleman. So sweet. So funny. So flirty. I know I’m not supposed to be looking, but all day long I have been obsessed. I know that it’s over between us. But how do I move forward knowing that I missed such an opportunity? For real love? He did nothing wrong. I’m not being nice. But he gave me chance after chance to improve and I didn’t. Not until it was too late. Not until he broke up with me did I seek therapy for my self-esteem and anxiety issues. Part of me is happy that he may have found someone that he can be happy with. Part of me wishes it was me. I wish that I could just delete him from my brain.