May 31st, 2017 by Niko

You’re my poison. You really fucking are. You are a pill covered in sugar. The poison is not in the pill but in the sugar. I get a taste of what I think I want and it ends up turning my inside into sludge. I pretend in my head that I don’t see your flaws but who am I kidding. Only myself.

I wrote you a suicide note last night. I didn’t get past the part where I said I hate you. I’ll work on it tonight. Maybe it will be be as simple as “are you happy now” will you be when all is said and done. I bet you won’t be expecting it. Maybe you do. Who know what goes on in that fucked up mind of yours.  As long as your happy right?  Hasn’t it always been about you. You think I remind you of your father but you are your father. Maybe that will end up in the note too. You should know. You should know that you broke me. I am in peices whike putting on a smile for the whole world to see.

Whats behind that smile. A brain thinking of all the lose ends that’s need to be tied up. A brain thinking this is its last 24 hours to live. I’ll keep smiling tho. Right up until the BANG!

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