I am laying here, in the darkness…feeling in a way that I have not felt in a very very long time….sheer utter panic, terror, and this deep sinking feeling of a void so vast and deep, that it can only tear me apart one molecule at a time.
If I could do my method right now, I would…. I honestly would…no hesitation no nothing…. just slip it on and be gone…
Only, I am waiting for one last piece of it to arrive…. *sighs*
I hate this feeling, I hate what it does to me…
I’m laying in the dark, telling myself, just don’t breathe….just don’t breathe…. for when I breathe, the panic grows.
If I don’t, maybe I will disappear to somewhere else…..
Darkness is not my friend like it once was, now it’s as painful as the light of day, just as painful as a burning sun.