Some days are tough than the others. Some days I just want get up, go to the gym and then go to work, as normal person. Some days I don’t want wake up, I just want lie down and forget I exist.
That’s why I cut myself. Not for others to see and think how broken I am. No! I do that because I want to feel the pain, I want hurt so deeply that I’ll remember forever.
I also works in away to make the inside pain go alway. It makes my mind go a little quieter. And it make me, for a moment, not think in kill my self.
Today was a day like that and that was the way I handled. My leg hurts… But at least I can have a little peace.
I don’t think this method will work forever. Everyday I fell the desire, the need, to finally end with everything.
Maybe tomorrow I do that…
1 comment
There comes a point when surviving is all that can be done with resources, and whatever works works.
But a floater technique to get you by often doesn’t have longterm helpfulness.
I hold off, find some new distraction, a calming place, and take time. Sometimes I can’t always ride it out.
And with pain, remembrance can be tricky. Why do you desire an eternity of knowing?