Forgiveness..

I accept and forgive myself for all the awful things that have happened to me. The only reason im still here idk, tbh..I tried killing myself countless times..always managed to save myself…got tired of trying so Im like facing the fact I gotta live…hopefully pain management does something for me…if not Im fucked, there is no way I can live in pain like this for years to come. Fuck that. Just put me out of my misery..