We all have that one “friend” from elementary school, that was ruining every friendship she/he could. In my case, that was my cousin (not my real cousin, but from distance). When this was happening to me, I had a brilliant best friend. We were unstoppable together. Until the “friend” came in between.
She was hanging out with my friend more and more and ignoring me. During lunch breaks, she was always hanging out with my friend and talking bad about me. I sincerely don’t know why. And my friend actually didn’t mind it/noticed it until I told her.
She didn’t believe me. And this is where the unstoppable duo became a jealous third wheel, the impostor, and a friend. More and more was I giving myself to anger and jealousy until the elementary school ended.
I went to a high school in another city and my friend proceeded to art school with our “friend”. We didn’t talk a lot anymore, or at all. And one day it was too much for me. She sent me a non-sense video and I thought she was drunk. Blah, blah, blah we got into a fight. We solved it. Then we got into another fight a day before her birthday and we haven’t talked since then. I mean, we talked twice; once she called me drunk, full of sad thought why do I hate her, why did I leave her and the second time I texted her that I miss her (it ended sadly for me). Oh, and the time she called me we agreed that we’ll meet the next day and talk about it. And what did she do? She pretended she doesn’t remember anything. Like at all.So, what am I trying to say is, that she’s still hanging out with that “friend” all the time. an
So, what am I trying to say is, that she’s still hanging out with that “friend” all the time. And that “friend” is hanging out with one of my best friends. Clearly, we live in a different city.
This is my concern for the “friend”: I’m scared, that she will somehow ruin everything I still have with one friend left. And we listen to the same band (I’m from a really small town and they are a small band and I’m scared that they will somehow meet her and like her; she has a gorgeous voice…).
I know that I’m full of unnecessary fear, but I concern myself with every little possible threat. And I know I have to accept the past and let it go and live in the now, but I simply can’t. I talked about this with all of my close friends but I’m still unsure about this. About the closure.
1 comment
When it comes to closure, your friend is probably the easiest way to reach it. Maybe ask again if you can meet, at a time when you know she’d be able to remember it, possibly over text or email, something you can point back to.
Or you might decide that it’s not really worth it and try to cut ties completely. You may want to do that with your cousin if you think she’s not a good influence in your life. You do live in different cities though, and distance can create a gap in a friendship anyway, while people can get busy and wrapped up in what they’re doing, which is normal.
I do think your fear about the band is one of those unnecessary ones.
Also think about trying to find more friends, if possible. Places you hang out, events for any type of hobby you have.