We’ll I guess I’m back right fucking here

What do you fucking know. I’m back here. I know my last post talked about how “free” I was or whatever, but I think we’ve all had that conversation in our heads and always know how it ends up. Is anyone even still here. I mean SP always get’s a new batch every so often, but don’t you think how weird it is that we don’t know each other personally. I mean the guys I knew might have had their last post a month ago or so, and I have no idea what is going on with them. They could be dead or in rehab or completely fine for all I know. It’s crazy. Does anyone remember cordless? I remember everyone was really supportive of her and always worried about her. I mean you would get posts directly asking about where she is. I haven’t flipped through the posts at all, so maybe she posted a day or two ago. I don’t even fucking know. Well I’m in college now. Been here a week and I already feel alone. I mean it’s like highschool in the sense that everyone has their groups and you’re just there watching all of them have fun and shit. Except now it’s fucking everywhere. Where you sleep, where you eat breakfast, when you’re just chilling out in your fucking room. You can’t even get a damn burrito from that little shop you like, because it’s swarmed by fucking college kids and their shit. And you feel a bit more pathetic, because you’re just sitting in your dorm and hear a bunch of music and laughter two doors down. I’m still on meds. The last time I saw my psychiatrist he said you look fine and you’ve obviously progressed, but I kept giving him the same fucking answers for the past two three months. How’s your appetite? Fine. How’s your energy levels? Same as usual. Are you getting sleep? Yes. I mean fuck even a blind man can see that I am the fucking same from when I walked in. I told my counselor that summers aren’t particularly hard for me, save for a few tiny mental breakdowns. If you could call them breakdowns. It’s mainly just me crying silently to myself criticizing myself out loud like a psychopath. Well looks like I’m back. Maybe for a while maybe not. You know how this shit ends up. Well thanks for listening if anyone is actually listening.