During my 20s I used to fantasise about going in to the woods in the middle of the night. Find an empty isolated clearing in the woods, miles away from any civilisation. Dig my grave. Shoot myself in the head. Then proceed to bury my dead body in the grave. Shoveling the dirt over my dead body. Patting down the soil on top. Then I stand back, feel relieved and happy because I did it all on my own. Then I dissappear. Because I’m dead.
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I’d like something like that too.. being able to take care of everything myself.