I got sick, like fever, sore throat, headache kind of sick. And for the first time in awhile, mentally I felt fine. No thoughts about suicide at all. In fact, I had a perfectly valid reason to stay in bed, but went out with my friends anyway, had fun, then ran into another girl, who I know in passing, and ended up hanging out with her for a bit. Then I even talked to my roommates like a normal person, and not an antisocial anxious mess. It’s like the physical pain overwhelmed the mental one? Of course I was also being a masochist by going out while sick…
Does this make sense to anyone?
I wasn’t even anxious around people, because I kept focusing on how lousy I felt physically. It was great!
2 comments
Well, being sick means you were probably very conscious of the physical discomfort, no? That is indeed the trick to it. Being grounded by something. You don’t need to be sick to do it, but sometimes it helps.
I used to get these massive anxiety attacks whenever I had to deal with graphic design customers, like apocalyptic anxiety. I’d just focus on how odd it was that I was experiencing anxiety over talking to a customer who looked me up. Oh no, he might give me a color palette! Sure, it might be odd that I’d suddenly start laughing at myself mid-conversation, but it is what it is.
Why would you be anxious around cool people? Cool people will always have your back.
I’m only anxious around cocksuckers……. hahahaha literally