October 13th, 2017 by Number

Just.. lonely. Feeling empty. Wishing I didn’t push people away.. Wishing I was more sociable and less… awkward.

I swear I am a likeable person… once you’ve known me for agggess and finally I let my walls down. This never happens so …

Hence why I’m feeling fuckin awful.

I’m probably just looking for validation from people. Just using them to full a void. You read everywhere that you shouldn’t look to people fot validation blah blah. What am I meant to do? Read a fuckin book?? Oh yeah. Great. My misery is cured.

Or start a new hobby?? Oh yes. Great let’s start going to the gym and getting fit. Wait.. But let’s also compare ourselves to other fit people. Let’s start obsessing and feeling inadequate about ourselves. Then let’s feel miserable about that too

How have I got here. I just.. I dunno. I just have to suppress it. Go on with routine pretending I don’t care

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