My first attempt

October 16th, 2017by NotAlright

I was always a loner, I am just the girl who would sit in the corner and read alone, having only a few friends. I’m also one to have a lot of secrets and put on layers and layers of masks, to hide the brocken form and tears… and soon, I nolonger know how to cry, how to laugh from my heart, or how to smile truely. I hide away behind the walls, and isolated myself even more to protect what’s left of me, to protect my thick fire walls and masks. And due to those suppressed emotions, I always have a problem with my temper, which leads to lesser friends and more enermy. And soon, even my family life became messed up, I would blow up on them, yell things that I never ment to say st them. Now, sometimes, I would wonder how the true me is like… I no longer knows.
My lif e was so messed up, I throw things, I yell at things, I see things in the dark, and at night, I wanted to cry, but I can’t, any more.
When I started my first year in secondery school, I can’t take it… so I downed a handful of unknown pills from my dormate, and it didn’t work, at all.
after that, I have ran away from home, and self harmed a few times by banging my head against the wall repeatedly, nothing big.
My family have became so broken… and out of a desprate attempt to mend my family relationship, I started cutting myself… but I’m scared,of what I would become.
I used to have so many dreams, so many possable feuture… But what would happen to me now?

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