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The end. Shout Out to MTPLUTO, CSmith,


I don’t remember. I let that shit GO. THEY DON’T EVEN REMEMBER!!! XD…
Oh no…
I don’t think I belong here anymore. ?

I think I’m done here. I posted the type of stuff a depressed person HATES to hear. I Know I freaking HATED that type of speech. I need to get a life now that I feel like being alive. Thanks to everyone who helped. Thanks to all who made it interesting. You guys rock. If I ever said we should talk shoot me an email @carlospejuan@aol.com . I may take a while to respond as it’s not my real name. Or account but I’ll try.


P.S. This last part is irrelevant like the rest of my posts:
To all the fans #haters I got at the end. Thanks so much for the attention. I tested you and you ALL fell for it. I’M flattered that you would leave your daily life to come and try to anonimously make me feel bad on a SUICIDE website. I now realize why somethings I say are taken a certain way. And I’m glad you helped me. You all are the reason why I am going to work hard. And trust me, MY MIND IS SET. Thanks again for… I’m not even sure, I guess showing that some people need a hobby? Or reminding me WHY I stay TF away from people? Lol yeah thanks


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PPPP3 10/24/2017 - 2:19 pm

I really enjoyed reading your posts, especially the ones expressing hope, despite the challenges you have.
Before you give-up on people,
(due to “haters” here u mentioned)
please remind yourself
that u would expect on an anonymous website related to psych,
especially from the chronic long-termers here,
to find some really inappropriate remarks.

IDK if it’s due to their mental illnesses, their hatrid for life+people, and/or
cause they have nothing better to due with their time (e.g. simply are obnoxious brats seeking attention)???

Regardless, u have so much to offer,
please remember to block/ignore the (bad) things in life that can’t easily be changed…
(such as LOUD, evil/mean/selfish/deranged people, who enjoy hurting others).

It’s the only chance we have for surviving with a little joy/happiness/peace,
is to consciously BLOCK out the bad
we have no control over and can not change.

EVERY DAY I remind myself to

Sadly, really “bad” sometimes finds me anyway. And I’m really tired of the battles 🙁
(Why I eventually lost all hope).

Survivors like you with a positive attitude (hope), despite the bad they’ve endured,
are so inspiring to others.

Thanks again and the best to you in everything you do.
You can and will succeed in life, as long as you remember to not allow others to pull you down.

(A shame I didn’t learn that years ago).
Hope I bounce back like you have,
and if I do,
for the rest of my life,
I will always protect myself FIRST
so I don’t get knocked down again by evil.

Take care.

Btw, I hope my note doesn’t sound dumb, intent was to make you notice/realize
that likely their was many people who appreciated and benefited from your posts here
that you never knew or interacted with.

Another fact of life=
The (few) loudest, most obnoxious people typically get noticed + attention,
while us (many) quieter, regular, decent people, who are worn out by life,
sometimes just need to hang out in the background;
So u maybe didn’t know how much we,
the majority,
appreciated you here?…You were.

LordsWrath 10/24/2017 - 5:15 pm

Wth happened?

PPPP3 10/27/2017 - 9:11 pm

Niceness + appreciation to CARLOSPEJUAN, to counteract those “haters” who made him feel “bad”–(as he describes):
“… that you would leave your daily life to come and try to anonimously make me feel bad on a SUICIDE website…”.

I anonymously (he doesn’t know me) wanted to make him feel “good”.
I’m fed up with the haters of this world too. Inspires me to be even nicer to repair the damage they cause.

CARLOSPEJUAN 11/1/2017 - 4:02 am

No, they didn’t make me feel bad. They TRIED to make me feel bad. Who’s is ironic to me since I’m in A SUICIDE website. CLEARLY whatever they said didn’t matter proper or after this.

PPPP3 12/25/2017 - 5:20 pm

Glad 4 u that you don’t allow people to make you feel bad.
Some of us, like me are not as comfortable being completely alone,
(why I stopped by today, thinking I might find someone else who is completely alone today, to share with
and to make myself feel better that I’m not the only one on earth,
no cards, no merry wishes, no invitations, no calls, no gifts- of course–).
It’s interesting to try to figure out, why.
Same thing happened last xmas to me.
– Even those I hear from during the year on other days, seem to make a special effort to make sure I’m unrecognized on special days like holidays, birthdays.
Conclusion: Not only does my life suck, but the few I know suck even worse. (Passive agressive or just simply mean, abusive or very selfish.
I guess I needed the reminder (holidays do that)– that I’m trying so hard to remain alive + productive for absolutely no reason.

Yep, just like in my prior life, people notice me ONLY when I have something they want/need-

Enough feelibg sorry for myself-
Hope others are having a better day and are appreciating anything they do have.
Even the simplest things like a home and $ for food to eat today.
(I don’t have those things either today, which is stressful, but the worst part of day is not 1 person thought I was worthy enough to call or text “Merry Xmas”.
1 did yesterday (a prior homeless woman that lived in a motel I did in summer) – I appreciated it…
Take care. Have a peaceful, if not MERRY day.

And, I hope for both me + you that I’m not alive next xmas to write another pathetic note like this again.

HollowBoi 11/1/2017 - 6:56 am

This song is lit, and yeah hope you scatter them good vibes everywhere its rare for suicidal people like us to recover completely so always stay safe and positive mi amigo.

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