Your soul leaves your body and hovers above you while a wave of emotion larger than Katrina crashes over your body while you are completely silent in a room full of screaming people. You hear screaming but all inside of you is silent. You plunge into the maelstrom. Your body does not fight. The maelstrom dies down and you’re floating swimming under the strongest tide for a minute, blowing bubbles. You don’t want to break surfacez Then the surface breaks and you take a deep breath. Melancholy envelops you. Your pulse is a deep baritone bassline. You remain silent and still while everything is moving around you.
Or how about this. You have waaayyyy too much to drink. You go lay down on the couch because that is all you can do. You stare up at the wall. And your body is not bound by gravity. You feel the Earth spinning at true speed of 1000mph like you are not immune to a still life. You cannot find a center. You keep spinning, you keep spinning, you keep spinning. You know how the astronauts feel
Happy Holidays. Be safe.
2 comments
Sometimes, but not intentionally. To be able to do it willingly i would need to be able to look into the abyss without averting my gaze.
Alcohool doesn’t have that effect on me though. Just quiets the noise and chatter.
I used to dissociate a lot when I worked in retail pre-press. I’d have one customer at the counter, turn around to check on their order, and when I came back, I’d have 20 customers all standing there with their arms crossed, glancing at their watches and making exasperated groans. Then a printer would break, or run out of toner, and pretty soon I’d be a fly on the ceiling, watching myself quietly lose my mind while pretending to be totally fine, not flustered at all. I blame that reaction for my somewhat blunted affect. I’m like Daria from that MTV cartoon now. “Oh, really? The building is on fire? Great, where did I put my jacket? Oh, right, I left it on the hanger by the staircase. Hold on a minute, I need to use the bathroom before we leave. It’s hot in here.”