Hi. Imma tell you guys why I said “They would never believe me.” So I’m a 13 year old girl who has been suffering for quite some time now.

It all started when I was 8 years old, I was a little chubby girl at that time and I was bullied for it. I never told anything about it to my family, I would just say that I always have a great time at school but the truth is, I was not. I mean I had friends my age but older students would pick on me, saying that I was fat, ugly, worthless, garbage, and many more. I never frowned nor cried when this all started but every word they said was like an arrow shooting my heart. This continued for about 3 years and when I was in 6th grade, some of my classmates would call me those words again, but at that time, I met someone.

You guys know Omegle right? I met him there, he became my friend but I kind off forgot about him so, let’s just say I talked to him again in my freshmen year.

During my freshmen year, I met my Dark side, I’ll just call her Akumu. So Akumu always helped me stay sane, I was already on the brink of killing myself, then I talked to the person I met before, I’ll call him Vin. He helped me got through a lot of stuff like stress, depression,and other stuff like that. I asked him if he could be my non-biological brother, he said yes then we started our brother-sister relationship. I told him all of my worries, and all my thoughts (suicidal). In other words, he saved me from almost killing myself.

Let’s take a huge timeskip and I am now in 8th grade, which is happening right now. I’ve been judged by people, they say those words that haunt me in the past, but they add more things like I’m such a drama queen, they say I’m distant, they say I’m always quiet and they say I’m always NOTHING. Even though they were the ones who were those things.

Now back to mt non-biological brother, Vin. He left me. One of the closest people in my life, left me because I made a small mistake. I’m tired, of everything happening to me and actually this November 2 or 3, 2017, my second brother left me. He blocked me on Messenger and Facebook. I don’t know why he did it, but I knew he wasn’t fine at all.

I’ve always wanted to ask this question, “Am I bad luck?” Why does it seem that everyone close to me is leaving me. I’m not like other people here with disorders and lost/broken family but I will confirm that I’m suicidal, a masochist, and a sadist. Of all that’s happening to me, my depression started to come to me when I was in 7th grade.

Right now, I would tell others that, “I’m too shy” or “I might say something wrong.” That’s all true. I’ve got this fear when I’m too afraid to say something because I think that I would just say something stupid, so I go quiet and try to listen. THEY WOULD NEVER BELIEVE ME WHEN I SAY THIS, “I’m just a regular girl who was bullied and misunderstood in her childhood, even up until now.” They would just say that I’m the worthless one. That’s why I’ve had enough of it. I’m too tired.

But really, if you’re reading this, thank you for taking your time to read it, please tell your opinion in the comments or something.

But please do understand, after all, this is a REAL, All of it happened to me. I’m so so close to killing myself.

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