was okay for a bit…

January 10th, 2018by SleeplessMind

Then like always, the f*cking train detrailed. I was okay, I would keep fighting for my life so my kids wouldn’t suffer…. When reality came to slap me in the face. My baby has been sick months, my elder child says I deserve to die, my landlord isn’t doing a f*cking thing regarding the mould making my baby sick- but was kind enough to leave a notice of rent increase.

Options- 1] move in with 1 of 3 who molested me when I was 4, 2] move in with person who killed what should be my eldest child, 3] take my kids, my cat, and bare essentials, and live out of our vehicle in Canadian winter.  4] hope like hell there is no suicide clause in my newly acquired life insurance, finalize will, and finalize myself.

I have nothing left to give, I’m only pieces of what once may have been a whole.. But it’s difficult to remember life before  molestation began, perhaps I never was whole.

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