Im feeling really fucking low right now and trying not to self destruct. Refer to my previous post for details. My trip to this country is beginning to look like it was a pointless waste of time and money, and is leaving me feeling worse than ever instead of being my salvation. How do i not just say fuck it and fall into old destructive habits. If it werent for my girlfriend and all the people who have faith in me id already be there. I just want to cry and simultaneosly(sp) hit something.
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I will not pretend I have some sort of profound advice for you, as you face circumstances that I am not qualified to comment on. However, you sound like you have a lot that you need to vent about and things that you just need to say to someone.
I am here for you to listen, and to offer any help that I feel will be of use to you. Please, don’t dispair. We may not all be on the same path in life here, but we all struggle with the same issue.
Sometimes kneading dough can help me when I want to punch something. Or just making loud noises can help, like with two metal lids clanging together. I tend to just bang a bunch of dissonant keys on my keyboard to help me. Or go for a walk, especially by water. Or taking a shower.
Thanks, I went for a walk down to the beach, that helped a little. Still haven’t heard from the guys who were supposed to treat me, but it is what it is. I’m feeling a little better and just hoping that things will work out. I’m just so tired of being let down.
And to wolf, I definitely needed to vent, that’s why I wrote my previous post. And it did make me feel a bit better was just hoping for some encouragement, so thank you. When I’m in this state I often can’t see things as clearly as normal so an outside perspective is always helpful.