Is anyone out there??

  February 3rd, 2018 by Urm8451n

I just feel so solitaire.

I’m not talking to any friends of mine, nor seeing them. I’m busy on my studies, but even so, I’m so bothered by the financial debt. I’ve been trying to hold my head above water for years, but I’m now under water holding my breath.

I know I won’t make it far away like this. I used to talk to myself a lot, but I don’t have that privacy to do so. I have roommates which are around me most of the day.

I were for long time a safe of my own life experience (the bad kind of), and I’ve never shared anything.
I feel like this safe is getting really heavy to carry, and it makes me drown ever further.

I wish I could overcome this feeling today and very soon. I’ve a test to get ready for. By feeling I mean suicidal. I never thought I would get this, but my heart says I must kill my self. My hollow soul is a black hole sucking in all kind of good experiences and feelings.

I hope to bare around for long enough to graduation.
But untill then, I’m just here for the swim.

Be brave, stay strong, Yours Jac

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