No way out.

March 16th, 2018by MariannaMoonChild

Well I’m not exactly suicidal anymore it’s just that im sick and I thought I could just let myself go. I’ve already attempted suicide 3 times and I wouldn’t recommend anyone do it because the feeling was so strong and awful and the next day you will have stomach pain and throwup. The third time I figured I didn’t try hard enough so I kept trying each time it failed, only to find the harder you try the MORE pain you will feel and I really messed myself up that last time for trying so hard, I actually liked my face which is now not healthy looking anymore. But anyways my big struggle in life has been my hair I was born with nice hair but my parents shaved it after I was born and it’s never been the same. I can’t do anything with it and it won’t grow long. As a kid I coped but when I turned 15 I just couldn’t go on. I stopped going to school and slowly stopped going out which led me to become sick. So now I’m dealing with hair problems and a sickness and I don’t know what I’m going to do about either. I believe in reincarnation. And when I think of all the parts of my life that I hate like my brother and Mom I just wish I were dead. I just know that there’s more than this. A place that I belong and fit in to. I also know that spirit guides, christianity and the religions that I’m into are against suicide and that they say there will be a punishment but I keep telling myself it’s my right not to seek help. I really can’t see any way out but to die.


Update: so I’m feeling alot better. I’m going to try to live on. This link really helped.

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