Daily Goals

  March 10th, 2018 by Zigzag

Things seem to be improving for me a little bit. I’m feeling Sparks of life, and I’m holding on to them tightly, white knuckle. I am thankful that they are even there.

For the longest time, I have had a lot of problems trying to cope with and manage my emotions. When I was a teenager, I was so depressed that my depression was all that was on my mind. I didn’t think about anything else really. I didn’t know how to handle it, and so I spent a lot of time by myself. That negatively affected my social life, which worsened my depression. My depression kept affecting things in my life like that, and so it kept building and getting worse and worse. I wasn’t thinking about goals, or my future, or about what I could do to build a happy life for myself. I don’t think I had any concept of that even. I was too busy trying to cope with things to think about that. I’ve only been able to realize due to a recent epiphany that working on goals despite how I feel actually improves how I feel.

I sat down and wrote down the things I’d really like to see in my life, if I could have them. Things like finishing school, going backpacking more often, exercising more and getting more healthy. Things I’d always thought about but never really did anything about because I was too busy trying to cope with depression. I made a long list. Lately, I’ve been going through that list and thinking about what I could do in one day, each day, to work towards achieving those things. Daily goals, you could say. And then, I’ve sort of forced myself to do the things on my list of daily goals. Because of this, I think things are finally improving in my life. I think this is working. I’m finding that when I stay busy that my mind is occupied enough to focus on the depression less. Accomplishing those things has been eliminating the things that I’ve been judging myself about for so long. So, I guess I’m just going to keep going on this path. I think things will finally start to get better. I shared this in hopes that maybe this would work for someone else as well.

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