I was wondering if anyone else is going to spend it alone .. &if you have to or if you chose to ? If you will daydream about a better Friday before you sleep or not ? If your family spoke to you today ? If anyone made you feel kind of ok today ? If you think you can sleep through the night or not ?
I’m in a very dark place right now and kind of just feeling out for some situation that says “there is hope”, even if it’s not myself directly experiencing it.
My mind is so tired .. I’m going to put it on a vacation until Monday.
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Weekends are the worst I usually spend them drunk. Sometimes with friends sometimes alone. Lately when I go hang with friends it’s harder though cause I have to put on a happy show at least when I’m alone I can be comfortably sad. I cry a lot and it’s hard to hide that when you’re with people
I agree. Same here. 99% of the time I’m under the influence of whatever when I do go out because I get “pangs” of jealousy when I see people out and about &happy with friends.
My situation turned overnight when I found a wonderful and beautiful lady.
There is hope.
Thank you for sharing &am happy your situation turned around for you 🙂
@foundhappiness Indeed your situation has turned over night. I can relate. I have found new love five times during my own life. Each new lady was quite an improvement over the previous and all were outstanding persons. Each time new love made the world look sooo good (at first) and my suicidal tendencies just vanished, for awhile.
After the new of each new love wore off, in say six months to a year, I would be right back to wanting to off myself. Also, these dear ladies, who put so much of their own time, energy and hearts into these relationships was in fact bonded to a suicidal man (me) who gave them much grief and a broken heart. My present love knows all this pain much to well. Either I will fix my brain or blow it out but I will not look for another woman to ease my pain. I will not.
Either me and my therapist fix me or we don’t, but no more of the above behavior because I now see there are no winners “love conquers ________”, just broken hearts and problems left unresolved still.
@a1957 sometimes that is the missing puzzle for some people. Someone unknown by you with no obligation to love you, who kind of truly does . I can’t relate , but I often find myself thinking maybe it could happen for me too instead of the many superficial relationships I have . Let him enjoy his lady..