April 16th, 2018 by usernamee24

i don’t care if anyone reads this i just need to say it. i’ve had many eating disorders and i have always had a deep deep hatred for myself. i’ve attempted suicide one other time and after i overdosed i realized i was afraid to die. my stomach was pumped and i was sent away to some mental institution. but now i am realizing that nothing has changed and i still hate myself. my family and friends don’t understand or care about how i feel. so i’ve been alone for a long time. i really want to end it, just go to sleep and never wake up. that sounds nice to me. no more pain or stress. it would all go away. but i’m afraid that i’ll attempt to overdose again and it won’t work. then i’d be left in pain. i’d be sent away again. so how do i win? i honestly think i’d be the happiest if i were dead but how do i know for sure that i will be successful in killing myself. what if i fail at that too?

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